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 Post subject: Bloggies!!
PostPosted: Wed Feb 14, 2007 11:52 am 
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Joined: Tue Jun 13, 2006 8:30 am
Posts: 101
Location: Parrottsville, TN
Ah, to better let you in on what goes on in my life, I'll just paste by blog that I type every day, and post on Facebook & Myspace.


Well, slightly short on time, but not enough that I have to write a short blog.

So far so good. My job is doing well. Cleaned another section of the lab. Man, that place is a goldmine with the things you find. Its like you're in dreamland! Surrounded by science...I love my job. Much better than dealing with stupid crappy little backhilled Tenneseeans in Greeneville with their groceries. Eat cesium, wapoopoos!

I submitted a pretend budget to Mrs. Foutch today in hopes of what she'll say. I am pretending to make an imaginary government to practice some of the stuff I learn in class. I have appointed deskmate Wendy Stiner as my Secretary of Defense, and have appointed 40% of our budget to Military Development, 35% to Population support, 15% to Research, and 10% to stockpiling(which is actually as secret fund to develop mobile battle suits). Let's see what she says, and if Barfy gets a whupping.

I think I have math homework at home when I get there. I know I will go to bed early, and will want to draw and write. I will try to find a way to post some of my stories online on Facebook. I think I'll just post it as a note. If that's the case, I'll post a few before I go home.

I am helping Mom and Dad revamp the store. We've cut the showfloor size in half, and installed a new door last night. I am hoping to get things on my business done by tomorrow, and start advertising so I can start making money.

My room is a mess! Most of it is laundry and stray papers. I'll try to take care of that when I go home, too.

About my blogging, I will try to post a blog every day. If I don't, I assure you I'll try to do one at least once every other day. Helps me get over not writing people now that I don't have a pen pal anymore.

Well, gotta make it to Greeneville before they leave and I don't get to see how the store looks,

Janeil H.

Tuesday's (Yesterday)

Okay, somewhat short because its nighttime and we're going home soon, I am revamping the Millenium Project Plans and starting to design it on paper from scratch again, in light of Window's Vista's release. I have a delayed project time, but am trading waiting until the end of the semester for countless hours to work on it, a double increase in funding, and a wider of array of parts that came out from Saitek Industries, namely the Eclipse II keyboard.

I might have a party-out with Medhavin & UV at their house and engage in a sleepover at Wiggy Raj Starbase. I have to call back and find out if its okay. That'll be awesome!!!!

My crab is missing. I have not seen it for about a week, and fear the worst. I still drop in algae tablets at night in hopes that it will eat it, and hope that it is still okay. Though it may only live for about a month or so, and that I'm slightly scared of it, I like it a lot, and its my pet. I don't know if it tried to attack a platy that's also missing, and I'm still mystified how it breached the plastic barrier on the fish tank...

Posted a lot more pictures! I am just uploading tons and tons of stuff....I know, but bear with me, enjoy them, and if you particularly like any, COMMENT!! It makes me happy :D.

Over and out,

Janeil H.

And today's,

Wow, things catch up a lot, but now that I'm almost up to speed, composition is easier.

Biology Lab test today! I hope I did well, it seemed pretty okay. Only a few bones and one vein seemed to give me trouble, I did a good job remembering everything. I should get my grade back for that later today.

Guess what? We had snow flurries today! My car had a 1 cm covering of snow, and the lawn was whitish for once! But unfortunately, I see the sun out the window right now, and I am 99% sure that its melted when I get home. Then again...

Off to more writing! I shall write and write and write....must update about my space soon as finish up the physics lab least its not that messy anymore.

I want to go do a Eurodance party so bad! I also have taken a liking to music from Japanese artist Tamaki Nami, and want the Mechassault soundtrack so bad. They don't have that anywhere.

I think I'm due for another Gundam Seed movie. I watched Red Dawn about a month ago, and enjoyed it tremendously. I will admit I did cry; it was the first movie that made me cry. They did a very good job at potraying the emotions that are entwined with the friendship between Arthun, Cagalli, and Kira. Very touching. Its good to see them together again. And the last part about Cagalli being Kira's brother? Ho boy, that was a curveball!

Speaking of movies, movies I have watched recently are Over The Hedge, Cars, and Hoot. All good movies.

Now I'm off to have lunch and go clean the labs. Byebye!

Yayap: Hey look!! My Alpha-Bits are spelling a secret message!! Its says, "Ooooooo!!!"

Janeil: Yayap, that's Cheerios.

-Excerpt from a Halo Crossover

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2007 5:19 pm 

Joined: Mon Jun 12, 2006 6:42 pm
Posts: 529
all this new stuff eh? i need to start visiting daily again like i used too.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Mar 23, 2007 9:30 am 
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Joined: Tue Jun 13, 2006 8:30 am
Posts: 101
Location: Parrottsville, TN
Thursday, Feb 15

Augh!! I'm hyper and I'm short of time, and I WANNA GO HOME!!!

Okay, aside from bad grammar, I'll type a proper blog tomorrow. I didn't fall off the edge of the world...yet.


Friday, Feb 16

Ah, the weekend is here, Friday is turning dark soon, I have to go to the observatory in about an hour or two, and I'm browsing the internet. I think I shall now type my blog....

I had Mrs. Foutch's Political Science test today. Chuck Cody told me to tell her that he's still in 'La La Land', wherever that is. I still have to find out on the map the location of the mysterious La La Land...

Gotta go to the observatory tonight. I'm also going with Jason, Leslie, and Fudd to church tomorrow. When I get back, I shall play Mechassault 2 to my heart's content!! XD Then I shall work on the new installment on the Space Raptors story.

I have actually have to finish one...basically, we had an evil crystal life-form on board, and we SDD'd (Self-destruct device) it, and now are 'marooned'. It was an climatic installment, with a lot of people leaving, and only a few remaining. I also changed that supposed cousin Britney is a clone(but still related), and that Larina, ambassador's daughter from Ellenis, joins us occasionally & made her after Meer. Made a sweet outfit for MTech, which he approves of, and will continue writing maybe even as early as tonight...I left off romping around in the swamp with him and alien girl Jennifer in a tank with null sig...I think Jason was in orbit, and UV & Andrew were commencing a bombing run somewhere.

Have art trades! I'm drawing some stuff for people! In return, they'll draw stuff for me! I have one done and have three more to be done! I know one person is working on it at least.

On a serious note, I killed a possum yesterday. I wasn't happy about it, and was even more upset when I found out I had five rounds instead of ten. That was the first time I killed something...I don't think I'm so eager to go shoot something anymore on first thought, I'll have to think about it. Sarah boo-hooed her eyes out. I don't mind people having tender spots, the stupid girl cries all day because she hits a bug or bird while driving. I like compassionate girls, but I would at least like them to have some bravery or stomach. Not wimps.

My crab is offical MIA. I am going to conduct a house-wide search upon arrival at Bayer Starbase tonight. I have learned that the exoskeleton would be intact if its dead, and should'nt be hard to find. The thing's the size of atarantula, and missing four far can that thing go!?!

Enough said. I'm going to finish drawing the IGA Brittanica.

Monday, Feb 19

Okay, so I can't type every single day. Make that every single weekday, and when I get internet at the house, then on a weekend.

Cleaned out small betta fish tank yesterday. Also have to fill up evaporation loss in large fish tank. Not a lot aquarium wise, crab still missing.

Got some more work done in the physics labs today. Its finally shaping up. Maybe I'll get the camera on Wednesday and take pictures. If it had a bed & a shower, with a cool computer, wouldn't make a bad place to live.

I'm missing a Jabra JTB135 headset for the wireless phone since Friday. I think I may have lost it while either getting change or transferring stuff from one pants to another, but I'm not sure. I have a faint feeling that it may be in hope, and am praying that it is not outside the house. That thing cost 60 bucks, and I've only had it for two weeks.

Got somewhat lonely for a girl again today, and could use a hug or two. Dangit, anybody who's a girl and sees me often, hug me! I don't have girlfriends, or friends that are girls. It makes a difference and means something!

Also I could use calls! Nobody calls me either, not even Mom or Dad unless I'm somewhere at home and they can't find me.

Had a math test today in Precalculus Triginometry. I think I did okay in it, I'll find out soon enough. I shall also go home now.

I think I shall post blogs whenever available. I may have said earlier, but it helps when you really can't write anyone.

Signing off for now,

Janeil H.

Thursday, Feb 22

Well, its about time! I didn't get to type a blog on Wednesday, so I have a bunch of stuff to catch up on.

Dr. Morgan was out again yesterday, so I didn't work. I am trying to get my self-start business Orion Computer Services going, and hope to get some customers soon. I need advertising...

I upload a load of stuff this morning. I would go to the building, but the way the temperature is in the room, the air coming through the window, I think I'll spend some time up here. Its nice. I feel good for today.

School is doing fine so far. We started on our pig in Biology II lab. Its a girl, and I have called her "Lacus Gobbles". Okay, so maybe I was thinking of MrGobbles from my Halo multiplayers, and Gundam Seed at the same time. But my group didn't object. Lauren & I seem to make a pretty good team dissecting-wise. I hope all goes well next Wednesday. I actually saw a blue vein. A blue vein! They're literally blue! Not purplish blue, blue! It was amazing!

I learned something very interesting in Accounting class this morning. Mr. Love takes place in investigations in business and is hired to look into dealings in other business. Finally a maverick cleaning up scum around here. Too bad I could backseat with him and help him out. Glad to have him as my teacher, and after a few stories he told us, especially about the lady who was sending in false tax returns and sticking the extra money in the bottom of a freezer, made me want to give him a badge.

Dad is been itchy lately. He's been commenting on any video game I play, and is not been very nice lately when he comes home. I don't know what's up. Aren't parents supposed to be nice? What's bugging him? Why take it out on me?

I'm getting the itching for a waterfight soon! It just hit me this morning that winter is almost over! I will go home early today and do inventory on my waterguns, and will take pictures. For all of you, I love to have watergun fights, even if I'm big now. I have 30 soakers and buy about 3-5 soakers a year, and will continue to do my watergun fighting hobby. Andrew joins in, and we have a joint partnership in buying the soakers, maintaining them, and keeping them. Unfortunately, I haven't had anyone good to fight with over the past two years, and maybe can have a good year this time.

Uvraj is taking the TAG program at Walters State. I'm glad my cousin and his brother Medhavin are very smart. They're good kids, and despite being young, make extremely versatile buddies that outmatch people I know at school. That may change over time if my friendships develops, but they're always there. That's cool. They play videogames with me, they play computer games with me, we draw, we make up jokes, we go out on adventures, we visit each other on a frequent basis, and we write the Space Raptors stories.

Mom is probably wondering where I am now and what I'm doing. But I have a phone, and she doesn't call me! Nobody calls phone did not ring one single time at all yesterday. That's sad. Then they argue with me when I go that I don't tell them anything...hello, I'm right next door down the street. If you want to know anything, and have doubts, call me, for crying out loud!

Stomach's growling some. I could use some food. I don't think there's much for me to eat at the building when I get there. I would like some ramen noodles, or gurumba with roti.

Mrs. Foutch did not read my pretended spending budget for my simulated fake country in Political Science class, the Kurita Confederation. She said she'll get to it on Friday, and I'm really really wanting to hear what she says about it. Wendy Stiner is somewhat of a nutcase, saying that nobody gets her number, and that people will stalk her, and that she has to get to work! I've had second thoughts about appointing her Secretary of Defense for Kurita. I should have picked the soldier guy in front of me...

What else is on my mind to type? Dad dumped a bunch of fish flakes in the betta tank on Monday, I have to clean that up, especially that there is no filtration system in it. I still have to find out information why the betta fought with its mate; I'm trying to breed them. I'll try to convert downstairs for the Green Earth conservation program for trying to breed fish and plants in a controlled environment.

Still missing my earpiece. I believe it may be gone for good, but I hope it may turn up sometime. In addition to that, my Corridor 7 CD is missing, my new Super Soaker MAX-D 2000, my custom CD with Sigma Star Saga, Eurodance, and rave music, my crab, and of all things, my old 256MB SanDisk drive.

Sara finally called just now to know where I am. I took them from 11:30 to 1:36 to wonder what happened to call me, and it was Sara, not Mom. She is like. "Mom wanted me to call you. I'm making sure you didn't lose you way coming here, or you couldn't find your way." I swear, can't that girl figure out I'm someplace doing something, and I didn't get lost? She doesn't even remember what day something recently happened. If you asked her what day did we go out to Knoxville, she will say "I don't keep track of anything. I sleep on Suday, help Mom place the order for UNFI on Monday, post on a forum on Tuesday, help pack UNFI order on Wednesday, submit Writer's Challenge on Thursday, and close store on Friday. I don't keep track of anything else. It make sense to me."

The stupid girl has her alarm clock that goes off at 6:00 to 6:59, and she sleeps through the entire thing, it blaring in her ear. She does not hear me pounding on her door to turn it off, and sets her clock thirty minutes ahead and is always late for everything.

When we're supposed to leave at 9:00 to go to the building, she makes me get out of the shower at 7:30, then goes in at her merry old time at 7:50, then stays in her room, then gets out at 8:44 in her bathrobe sitting at the kitchen table reading a book. She makes us late a lot.

The other day Sara mad a giant tantrum when she improperly loaded the dishwasher. She clumped several bowls together, bowls that I had previously left in the dishwasher because they didn't wash properly. She had loaded them the same way previously, hence their dirty state still. I told her, "Don't do that, they won't wash properly." Stupid butterbeepoopoo rolls her eyes to the sky, sighs, and locks herself in the room for about two hours blasting music from the "Bratz" album. I swear her otolith crystals in her ear are damaged by now.

About two weeks ago, a red Pontiac Trans Am pulled into our parking lot after hours. Sara comes and tells me that Jason is in the parking lot. Looking outside and telling her that isn't Jason, I ask her if that looks like Jason's car. "No, its red and its parked here, so I think its Jason's car." Numbskull doesn't even know Jason drives a Nissan!! All she knows is car color! I could put a burgundy Infiniti of my car's year, and she won't be able to tell the difference. She's is so absent-minded, stupid, and naive.

If someone wants to perform major brain surgery on my sister, I could care less, go ahead. She is obviously missing extremely important skills that is important to everyday life, and refuses to acknowlege them, living in her own little world. I'm tired of dealing with her.

When I posted the 2006 Soakfest pictures a few months ago here on Facebook, she made this entire case that I'm exploting her on the internet and that she's been exposed and revealed, simply because she's standing in the lineup with the rest of the team when the picture was taken. She's also paranoid. Dad told me not to post her picture, and nobody else. However, Andrew let's me post him, and I do post mom. I hate it when I can't post cool stuff that happens because my family is in it. I would love a nicer sister who's normal, and maybe a more understanding Dad. 2nd thought, a great family that is nice and open would be nice.

I'm done ranting about my stupid sister. I guess its a thing girls go through high-school age, but other girls I know aren't like that. Sara enjoys and takes glee in being rude to people. She brags about it to the rest of us. A few girls her age that I have talked to at least have the decency to be polite. I hear so many awesome things about other peoples' sisters, and I wonder
why nothing like that ever happened over here. Jealous of other people? Maybe a little, but mostly just pure thinking and questions, maybe some regret in between.

The oil level on the USS Orion seemed to stabilize now after the oil change. I think she'll be good to go for awhile, but I have a feeling rear brakes need replacement. The back of the car makes clicking noises whenever I press the brakes. Too bad nobody every manufactured a turbocharger or a turbo kit for my model of car.

On a happy note, I think I've made a few new friends on Wednesday. Valerie Roach from my Biology 2 and Political Science class, and Samantha from my Triginometry class. There is also this guy called Johnatan from my Biology 2 class who seems to really enjoy the Biology lessons.

Okay, so this is a really really long blog. Sorry this is so so long, but its been piling up. I think I'm on par with life's events for the moment.

Friday, Feb 23

Well, very quickie since this is Friday, so far so good. I will be shortly enroute back to Greeneville. Andrew wants to go to K-Mart, and is considering picking up a Blazer for himself. I talked to Natasha, a fellow Guayanese girl I met in New York last night for the first time since last August, and was happy about that.

Otherwise, I'm outta here. I think I left my gloves in Mrs. Foutch's classroom, I better go fetch them. I might type better blog once mind is at ease.

Monday, Feb 26

Okay, so not a lot happened over the weekend. I have officially declared by crab as dead an time will tell whenever I will find his exoskeleton. Changed all but one of my fish tanks' water last night, and rerooted my live plants.

Dr. Morgan wasn't there when I went for work-study today, so looks like I go home early. Still need to figure out advertisement issues for my business...

Other than that, I think I'm starting to like digital art. I did a few ships today, and will probably do more over spring break. Certainly beats trying to role-play Starfury when I'm not bored. Well, just need to install Corel.

I might do some more on the current Space Raptors story right now. I think I'm more productive at college than home because of the convenience of an advanced computer. I am hungry and thirsty, but other than that, I don't mind it here. Plus, waiting for the "no-fly time" to end after the school zone hours are over for safety precautions is another way to be productive.

Let's see, now where was I? I didn't start?...Oh yes, Medhavin assuring everyone that we'll be fine. "Relax, I'm tuning his ride." A covert sneakabout on a deserted planet, Jennifer discovering a portal of some sort, find people from another time period that aren't supposed to be there...what else? Oh, did I mention the Vethos base beneath the surface? This is coming together all so nicely...

I can't wait for Spring Break! Its just around the corner... supplies...must eat...


Wednesday, Feb 28

Well, it has been sort of a little hectic with getting ready for Spring Break and all, but I'm getting on top of things for the moment. For once, trig made sense. I am hungry again. I had a Biology 2 test today, and will finish dissecting Lacus Gobbles in about 15 minutes.

There's this really wacky kid in my Political Science class called Wendy Stiner. I have absolutely no idea why I put up with her; she makes so much noise during class, and mentions endlessly that "I have to go to work!". Her latest declaration is that she's dropping, but she STILL shows up to class! If you're dropping a class, and you're still in it, and you have an F so far, what's the point in attending further? Maybe it isn't my business, but really. Why can't someone normal sit next to me at a class? Jeffrey Lane's sensible. Sean Long skips class occasionally, but he's sensible. Valerie Roach may not get Biology in a snap like I do, but she's sensible. Wendy isn't. Bitty Ditty Wendy Stiner is the perfect example of the not-so-nice people that come out of Jefferson County, obsessed about doing work and nothing else. Now that I think of it, her breath stinks, too. I hope she's gone soon.

Last night when I was coming home, I was talking to Jason on the cell phone. In the middle of our conversation, I encountered a giant "thing" across the road the resembled a golden-haired animal. It stretched almost across the road, and was of humongous proportions. I slammed on the brakes, but upon coming closer I discovered it was hay. Relieved was an understatement. I was starting to wonder what it was, but that was quickly put aside, realizing the biggest thing out here is a cow. Africa it may have been a different story...

I'm uploading mostly general picutres, no more photos of my life at the moment. As soon as Andrew clears the memory card, though, I'll be right back at it again. I work today, so it may be until tomorrow.

Speaking of which, I'll be going to Johnson City tomorrow. I'm visiting Raj, Jason & Kabir up at ETSU and seeing what their college life is like .I'm sure the trip will be extremely enriching.

Updated blog schedule is little blogs on Tuesdays & Thursdays, big blogs on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. And if all goes well, blogs might start coming on Saturdays & Sundays.

Right now, I think I'll finish uploading this batch of pictures I have, then hot-tail it to eat something. Later,

Janeil H.

P.S: I'll get a picture to post with my blog.

Thursday, Mar 1

What an exhilarating day! I am visiting Raj, Kabir, & Jason at ETSU today. We did a lot of fun stuff, I am enjoying my time better with Raj & Kabir, however. They play Guyanese music in their dorm & apartment, watch Talespin, take me on long walks on campus, and let me meet cool people that are very very friendly and give me hugs immediately! I enjoy ETSU so much! Its an awesome place! I had culture shock for the first two hours, but I am now adapting. This is the first time I've met so much people in a large learning environment. Walters State is so...quiet. The last time I saw so much diverse people, it was at Washington DC Reagan International Airport.

Right now, I'm at Raj's dorm hanging out with him. We're waiting for Kabir to finish at the basketball game, because my car is at his house. Then I shall go home. If I didn't have class, I would spend the night.

I will elate my experiences later. This has been a very enriching day, and I am glad that I took the time to spend it with my cousins and come here.

Friday, Mar 2

Okay, so this is a really really big blog. Let’s take it down from the top where I left off, Wednesday Biology 2 lab.

In Biology 2 lab, we did some major dissection on Lacus Gobbles, our pig. I had some interesting thoughts about the veins as I saw several of them, wondering about their consistency, etc.

When it came to the heart, it was covered by the endocardium. I told Whitney to be careful, but she didn’t listen and ignored me, promptly snipping a large gouge into it. There was fluid inside to lubricate the heart from rubbing against the body cavity & other organs, and that sprayed out. Whitney gave me a dirty look, even though I warned here. It was like it was my fault.

The heart was stiff, a big surprise to me. I was expecting something soft and squishy, not something as firm as a brain. It was about the size of a stick of gum or less. The intestines were soft as expected, and the stomach was like an empty balloon. I was disturbed when we had to snip its tongue out; memories of Romans slashing out prisoners tongues out so they couldn’t coordinate an escape came to mind as Lauren cut the tongue out.

I was extremely upset when I learned that dye was pumped through the veins and arteries of the pig. I really thought they were blue! Now what color are the stupid tubes supposed to be? I have no earthly idea…

After my lab, I went to go do my work study for Dr. Morgan. I started to do my regular work, making sure everything was in order. I had specific permission from Dr. Morgan to “play with anything I wanted to, as long as I didn’t break anything,” so if I found something unusual, I would check it out.

While cleaning up, I found two Geiger counters, a digital one with a light, and an analog with a gauge. Dr. Morgan had still left the radioactive samples in a box in closet 3, so I fetched the counters over to see exactly how dangerous this stuff was. They went off all right, but hardly clicked. However, there was one that clicked fast and loud, and showed .3 on the gauge. It was two samples of unknown material that had “Nucleus” written on two spool-like objects. I stuck it back in the box and left. I have to find out what that means.

I also got Dr. Morgan to get a repair man to fix the computer in the Physics Lab. Hopefully that means I can use it when I’m in there if I need to type something or the other, or need to do research. The guy was supposed to visit on Thursday, so when I get back on Monday, I’ll find out what the verdict is.

While we were waiting on a phone call from the Computer HelpDesk, we decided to go up to the observatory and exactly find out what was going on up there. We recalibrated the telescope, adjusted the time, and examined everything to see that it was in order. Dr. Morgan determined that we need a trash can, a light, and to get the computer working up there, also.

After that was done, I once more found myself in the physics labs putting up loose odds & ends. Dr. Morgan came up and asked me if I wanted any books of two bookshelves. They had belonged to Dr. Boyd & Dr. Ford, and were no longer needed by him, because he was using newer books. I happily obliged, and helped myself to anything I wanted. I particularly found some interesting things that astounded me; the legendary American Journal of Physics, this was the first time in my life I have seen this. I also go a bunch of Astronomy magazines.

For books, they were mostly physics & astronomy books. Statistics was another one, and specialty research journals. I should have gotten a calculus book; I’ll ask Dr. Morgan on Monday if I can get one.

We had a cart in the physics lab that I loaded my newly acquired collection onto. Dr. Morgan helped me carry it outside and load up my car. He’s a great guy, soft and very theoretical. Not bad for someone who worked with NASA.

After that, I went home. I had a late bedtime.

Now for Thursday.

After coming out of Accounting class, I got into the USS Orion. To my dismay, there was an inside leak in the car, and water was spattered all over my CD’s. I am still trying to sort that out. But anyways, I left to go to Johnson City.

After parking at Taco Bell, I rendevouz with Kabir, and followed him back to his place. After parking my car, I got a tour of the house, then we promptly went into his 2002 Subaru Outback to go to Sahib’s.

Arriving at the restaurant, I piled up Mushroom palay & rice. Kabir’s friend Joe came over with his girlfriend Allison. Jason then finally came, announcing that Fudd wanted “Hooters”. We ate, then left the scene once more.

I went with Kabir to ETSU. He had a practice speech to give to his chemistry professor about autocatalysis. His professor & his wife would critique him on what to change and how he did. His wife was nice; she didn’t know my name, and referred to me as “cousin”. She also gave me pineapple cookies. :D In the middle, a Vietnamese girl called Cho decided to sit in as well and hear what my great smart cousin had to say about chirals.

After he was critiqued, Kabir left me with Raj and went to go fix whatever errors he had in his presentation. We started to walk back to his dorm when I paused in front of the library, amazed. I had never seen such a big library ever, much less one on campus in that style. Raj then decided to give me a tour of the library.

First off, the giant marble steps that led up to it were worth over a million dollars, because they were marble. Once inside, I was treated to a great big spiral staircase, and an endless expanse of books that went on as far as the eye could see.

Raj showed me how to look up books, and I looked up a few. I found two that I liked; one on giant clams, and the other on deep-sea life. We both went to go look for them and after checking them out, proceeded to Jason’s dorm.

While en-route, we passed a girl who waved at us. I returned the wave, which shocked Raj big time. He finally got over it after I told him I wave back to anybody who waves to me.

Upon arrival at Jason’s dorm, Fudd opened the door. We caught him off guard with the camera, and entered. It was somewhat messy, and smelled of body odor. Anyhows, things got out of hand when they challenged Fudd to do 60 pushups. He took off his shirt and started. At push-up #16, he got up and claimed Jason scared him. I had the whole thing on camera, I didn’t see Jason scare him. Because of this supposition, Brandon sandwiched Jason between Raj. That was wild. I dove for cover and waited for the entire thing to be over.

Just about then, Kabir came over and immediately restored order. He had gotten plans to go to the basketball game, and was going. Raj couldn’t go, and they couldn’t find a ticket for me. While they contemplated what to do, I played with Jason on the PS2 for awhile. I got to drive the minivan, and the famous AE86 Toyota Corolla.

Raj decided to hang out with me until Kabir finished his game, and to ‘babysit’ me. He took me to the Culp building for main meal. I made myself at home in the cafeteria and started to eat pizza & soda. Raj ate a bunch of pasta.

First group of people to hit the table were Matt, Eric, & Sarah. Sarah took an instant liking to me, Eric seemed somewhat scatterbrained, and Matt was very reserved. I got hugged & poked, and enjoyed it very much. I never had people that really did that before. It was really heart-touching. I’ve known people for my entire three semesters here at Walters State, and they had hardly go beyond what their major is, much less hi. At that cafeteria table, within ten minutes of meeting people I’ve never seen before, I was getting hugged! The ETSU students I met so far are extremely friendly and know HOW to be a friend. Read it and weep, Waltie High.

After the first group left, Group 2 came in. Composed of Kathleen, Kacie, Casey(spelling?), and Rachel, I immediately found common ground with all of them. Rachel liked Techno music, Casey was Seventh-Day Adventist, Kacie liked me because I thought she was cool, and Kathleen just went along because of Kacie’s opinion. :D Rachel liked Scooter like Andrew did, and Kacie loved my suggestion of two chopsticks in her hair instead of one. I got my picture taken of her, and have been commissioned to let Rachel get a hunk of my Techno music collection.

After we got out of Main Meal, Raj decided to take me on the tour that I didn’t get to go on. “This is ETSU, Nightlife.” He said. We walked over the entire campus for an hour, talking about various things, while he pointed out what buildings were which and such.

About 8:14, we reached his dorm and sat down. I was immediately granted access to his dorm computer to add my two newfound friends Sarah & Kacie. After that, we browsed Facebook for awhile, then just sat down and talked, letting Guyanese music play in the background, a string of Christmas lights on that lit up the room.

About 8:53, Raj announced that he had to go play racquetball with a friend of his at the CPA. He showed me where Jason’s dorm was, gave me my books, and went down the stairs. Upon arriving at Jason’s dorm, I discovered that the door was open & they were in the midst of cleaning up. I put the books down and pretended to suddenly open fire with a plasma autorifle. I could tell that I genuinely scared them.

Going in, it was very quiet, not a lot. I was still waiting on Kabir. I watched an entire feature of Discovery Animals: Sea World, and part of a Star Trek. It was somewhat boring. I even watched the end of Back to the Future.

Finally Kabir came about 9:45 and took me home. I was given a tennis roll upon leaving Jason’s dorm, and Kabir & I left the ETSU campus back to Kabir’s house.

When we got there, Kabir showed me some pictures on his computer that he took, and I was off. We planned to meet again several times during spring break, and to have a good time. I left at 10:30

Upon leaving Johnson City, the weather immediately deteriorated. It was raining extremely hard. I was also getting tired, and had to call Jason & talk to him so I wouldn’t fall asleep. I hydroplaned a few times, and finally reached home at 11:50.

So that was my very tiring day. As for Friday, so far so dull. The weather is cleaned up, so that means I have to help out at the observatory tonight. Took my math class, and glad that spring break is here.

Well, I’m off to Starbase 7 now. I will upload my pictures when I get there. Signing off,

Janeil H.

Tuesday, Mar 6

All right, this is one 180 turn-around of a day. Sorry if this is short. Extremely weird and disturbing to me, even if it isn't to other people.

Mom's brother's wife, Aunty Nelly, got into a car accident this morning. From what I know, she left the road and hit a tree. Her spine is broken, and she was airlifted out of Takoma to a hospital in Kingsport. Details are extremely sketchy at the moment, and I don't know anything else.

Sorry, I gotta go. I'll update you later.

Wednesday, Mar 7

Today is unusually quiet. I feel that I'm being left in the dark at the moment. I have other things to worry about, however.

Aunty Nelly is in the hospital and is awaiting surgery. That's all I know for the moment.

I feel restricted right now. I was supposed to visit Medhavin, but Mom said that isn't a good time for her. I was supposed to visit the kid since over a month ago, but keep having it put off by Mom & Dad. I think I'll just visit them on Monday evenings when I get off work at the Physics labs like how I used to to keep up.

We're supposed to have company this weekend. I'm not sure who's coming, but "half of New Jersey" is coming, were Andrew's exact words.

Speaking of Sara, stupid her always picks a fight. I am sick of tired of her 'immature' behavior, and her being pampered and protected by Mom & Dad because she's the daughter. Screw her. When I move, bybybe!! No more stupid sister. And maybe I'll find a good substitute that's a hell one hundred times better than you are.

I'm itching to play DarkStar One. I don't even have a decent computer to play the game. I have to get a computer as soon as money allows. My xl847 is starting to fall apart, and I screwed the font folder up last weekend.

I think Guti, my pearl gourami, will need a different diet. More food that consists of something other than fllakes. I'll look into it.

Fleet Maintenance update, brakes on USS Orion need services. Rear brakes need replacing, & system bleeding needs to take place. I hope it gets done before the weekend.

Until now, I have some emotional garbage to clean up and take care of. Maybe I can do something to get it off my mind when I get home.

Monday, Mar 12

Well well, its back to school! Feeling somewhat lethargic, but hey, I did work today. Now its time for my blog.

Aunty Indra came over this weekend to visit everyone. I think everyone had a good time, got to meet Jennifer. Medhavin joined Facebook; other than that, an uneventful weekend.

I think I'll go home now. Maybe I'll pick up UV's Blazer if I get going..then again, I just feel like going home...

Wednesday, Mar 14

Okay, apologies for not writing a blog on Tuesday...Here's the deal.

Not a lot happened yesterday. Felt tired, so took a nap. Then delivered a power bill to Newport Utilities in Newport, then went home. Had accounting class too, but didn't enjoy it, I was tired and was attempting to stay away every minute. That's the last time I'm taking a business class for a long while. I'm staying with my sciences.

As a result of my trip, sorry Medhavin, your Blazer will be delivered on Friday or the weekend. I didn't get to pick it up. But I will, I guarantee you that.

As of my bored state, I have decided to incite several poke wars between people. I've successfully engaged Leslie, now to find other people. The Sarah Walls Campaign has been going on for about a month now, and tensions are growing once more between Misty Vinson, who had a poke war that lasted since November and ended in the beginning of March. Kacie does not seem to take attention to pokes...

Andrew & I got the Super Soaker CPS-4100 operational. Though a tad bit sticky on the trigger, and you have to take both hands to make sure the trigger fires, its much better than having no gun. That back in the fight, bring on the water gun fighting season. I'm wait, have to fix more stuff...and wait for warmer weather...but I'm ready! :D

I should write some of my stories when I feel bored, but most of the time I'm at the building where I can't do anything. When I'm in the computer lab, I can't drink or eat, so I can't think straight. It drives me nuts. Typing at home is a pain too, I feel the same way. At least I feel better at home...I think I need a vacation, not stay at home for a week, go out with people somewhere for a week.

Speaking of watergun season, Jason needs a watergun. I know he usually borrows mine during waterfights, but I believe that he needs to practice waterfight combat on his own when waterfights aren't taking place. That might help. Also frequent visits to may help too.

Now a quick gripe about Political Science class. I'm sick and tired of this guy in an army hat who keeps talking about absurd things about the government. Granted some of this stuff may happen, Mrs. Foutch takes it up and spends almost the entire class time answering his 'proposition'. I would skip class since 19 out of 20 times this happens, other than Lawrence "Mr. Barfy" Barfell who does the same thing, but I lose participation points if I don't show up. Valerie skips it completely. I can't blame her; too bad I didn't have the cold stone heart to skip it. I work my butt off for scholarship money, to attend college & learn things! Not sit in class and listen to political standpoints. To quote Val, "I think I can learn more by studying at home." I agree! This is the last time I'm taking a stupid 'behavioral science.'

We did our final dissection of Lacus Gobbles today. Take it from me, pigs that are three weeks old do NOT smell good. Its a good thing I didn't eat, I felt like I wanted to throw up. Anyhows, we looked at their genitals, and that was it. I felt sorry for Lacus in a way. It was a fetal pig that could have been born, and could have lived. Sort of experiencing the same feelings that I felt when I killed the possum; we hate and whatever to each other. A life is a life. We remember that, even when we die. Many of us don't realize that it hurts when we do certain things, and a lot more people than that don't realize that its a big privilege to live & breath, and that life is special & precious. Even after I get upset at people, I feel rotten. I'm not going into the whole philosophy of what's going through my head right now.

Doing my math homework last night, I wonder what its like to study with other people outside the classroom that actually would enjoy your company and/or be willing to help you out. Since I entered college in fall of 2005, I've only done that three times, all three in my first semester. Two was within my first week. I don't think that worked out very well for me. Kelley was my "study buddy" back then. Wasn't nice. I hate looking back at it now.

For me, a "study buddy" is someone you can bounce ideas off of about more than one class, study together regardless of what classes you take, and help each other out and accompany each other in various activites on campus. During my trip to ETSU, I saw tons of students with study buddies, and see a few on WSCC. I don't know what I'm doing wrong in the equation, but I haven't been able to get a study buddy since back of first semester. People in my class simply aren't interested in studying with me, even if I do ask them point-blank.

Felt bad most of all when I looked at the PASCO Scientific magazine last night. I don't know what hit me, but it was a picture of this boy & girl using the PASCO Xplorer with a IR Photogate to measure the speed of a rocket. It made me all gloomy until I went to sleep. I almost cried. Why? I still don't get some of my inside emotions, even now.

I am in the process of setting up a GDM-10 Gamma Spectrometer that was part of a project Dr. Ford was working on when he used to work there. He left it when he retired, and it was left just like that. Even the cord to his laptop that the college let him use because of his status. I've hooked it up to the computer and have gotten it to work with WinDAS. I'll tweak it more when I start work-study in about then minutes.

I've typed enough right now. My stomach is growling...

Janeil H.

Friday, Mar 16

Well, here we are once more on a Friday. Very rainy, quiet, nothing out of the unusual...yet...

Sudden realization; since its raining tonight, that means no observatory trip! Woo hoo!

Got the spectrometer working. Dr. Morgan is extremely thrilled about this, and we'll start doing experiments once I read the manuals and see what's there to do. Real science work! You can see a couple of the spectrums I collected in the photo gallery.

Then I cleaned up part of the observatory. Food years old, and things as coffee, creamer & such, I just threw them all out. Dr. Morgan was also happy about that, stating that "This is the first time someone properly cleaned up in here in 15 years."

Then I went home. Duh....

Thursday, got oil for the car & a fish filter. Also picked up UV's Blazer for him. I just need to drop that off for him. Also colored a lot of the drawings last night I posted yesterday.

Somewhat hungry right now, but don't have money/credits to go buy anything. That'll have to wait for now. As for other things...this is a comparitively small blog verus Monday & Wednesday. Over & out,

Janeil H.

Wednesday, Mar 21

Extreme apologies for not posting blogs on Monday & Tuesday. I wrote myself a schedule, and forgot blogging time...oh well, here goes nothing.

Got Medhavin's Blazer from the store yesterday. I'm sorry to inform Jason that there is no more left, some mysterious person, me, UV & Medhavin are the only ones that own the only Blazers that are leftover from last year's inventory of K-Mart. Sorta makes you feel like the few, brave, proud, etc...

Posting some more digital art and stuff today; sorry pictures are slow coming up, haven't taken any lately. Don't get the camera a lot. :(

Had a math test on Monday, had an accounting test yesterday, had a biology test just now, then I have a Biology test on Friday...that's a lot of tests! At least it would be over by the end of the week.

Felt sorta down this weekend, but am doing better now. Maybe it was a mood swing...

Now I shall go post pictures and whatever else. If I think of anything else, I'll blog it. XD

Yayap: Hey look!! My Alpha-Bits are spelling a secret message!! Its says, "Ooooooo!!!"

Janeil: Yayap, that's Cheerios.

-Excerpt from a Halo Crossover

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 23, 2007 2:25 pm 

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dang you been busy! it's gonna take me awhile to read all the way.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 23, 2007 2:28 pm 
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Lol, go ahead!

Yayap: Hey look!! My Alpha-Bits are spelling a secret message!! Its says, "Ooooooo!!!"

Janeil: Yayap, that's Cheerios.

-Excerpt from a Halo Crossover

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4:33pm Friday, Mar 23
Okay, this is a little quick, but I would rather type little now and nothing at all today.

Had a Biolgy 2 test today. Not much happened, took pictures of stuff I did in school. Can't wait to get home, and the weather is awesome! I am definitely playing with my water guns today if I get home early. Things may be looking up. Anyways, that's about it. I'm still drawing...signing off,

Janeil H.

4:57pm Monday, Mar 26 | Edit Note | Delete
Heya! Had a very busy weekend! Not doing a whole lot, going to redo Andrew's Honda's interior. I'll hopefully leave soon and get black paint for it in a few minutes. Hope Medhavin's & UV's waterguns are doing okay. That's about it for now,

Janeil H.

8:36pm Wednesday, Mar 28 | Edit Note | Delete
Well, its been late so far. Here goes, even if I am at home...

Finally figured out how to make my own music videos with video games...all I got to do now is have the footage, and mix it. Then, tada! Music video!

For today, not exactly happy. I was sitting outside the Natural Science building eating some Cheetos when a large group of girls came by and entered the front doors. In that group of girls was about three black girls together. While minding my own business, one of them says. "See that chocolate on the bench? Watch me get him. I want me some chocolate." And as they went by, she acted all nicey and waved and asked how I was doing. I replied it and waved back, but wasn't happy. It was all a joke/gimmick...

Dr. Morgan let me have a copy of the dynamics workstack so that I can mess around with it. The project is to launch a rocket, and estimate how high it will go. Sounds simple enough; I won't launch a rocket, but I do want to see the equations so I get what's going on.

Speaking of not so nice things today, while Dr. Morgan was helping me load the Orion with the rest of the old books, guess who came along? Mr. Lawrence Barfell. He declared that I need a storage unit for my books that I have...he seems to think its a big joke what I'm doing; A 40 whatever year old man thinks its silly of meto take books a college professor gives me for free, to study astronomy, and to trust science.

In Political Science class today, we actually learned something. Val decided to come today, and so did Mr. Bunn. We waited to hear what Mrs. Foutch had to say. As the class time went on, two people just got up and left. Mrs. Foutch promptly marked them off; Barfy (Barfell) had some words, but we learned more than listen to opinion today. That I was happy about. But why get up and walk out of class? That isn't owe the respect to the instructor/teacher to at least hear what they have to say.

I got to see a Portuguese man-of-war today in Biology 2 Lab. It was yellowed and the tentacles cut down to size so that it would fit in its plastic box with formalhydride (spelling?). We also saw a bunch of tiny jellyfish in tiny bottles, and a dead sea anemone. Finding Nemo comes to mind...Mrs. Eccles immediately grasped the relationship and did an almost perfect rendition of Nemo attempting to pronounce the name of this sea creature.

After talking to Jason on the phone last night about the USS Orion having a possible oil leak, after checking the oil level several times while driving it, I am concluding that oil that may have splattered on the engine is what may have caused the smoke. As for the engine overheat, I have to go check a thermostat unit for the water pump module.

I saw a trailer for the new Transformers movie yesterday. Finally! I remember watching those when I was little, and had a Transformers action figure at one to see it in real life, that would be awesome!

Finally getting into story mode, and am starting to type. Medhavin, Jennifer, & I finally hit the ground during a hot-drop with the tank. That's about where it is now, in real typing. Now to get will involve someone who is attempting to make portals, prisoners in stasis, a human enemy in addition to the Vethos' usual tricks, and whatever else my mind thinks it can add without making me blank out.

That's about it for now...later!

1:30pm Friday, Mar 30 | Edit Note | Delete
Wow, its been an entire week! I'm glad that's over! Oh well..

Got my first paycheck from work today. Happy! Now I can start saving up for the Millenium Project again. Hopefully by the end of the semester, I can have my new computer...

Found an interesting game called Startopia yesterday. I beat the demo, and like it a lot! I'll be getting it soon.

I'm hungry at the moment. I'm usually tired on Fridays, and there isn't exactly much to say. Hope you all have a great weekend,

Janeil H.

12:23pm Tuesday, Apr 3 | Edit Note | Delete
Okay, so sorry for not posting yesterday...things just happen too fast. Here's the deal...

Didn't work yesterday. Dr. Morgan wasn't there, so I just went to go eat at Ryan's, then went to Greeneville, & washed my car. My first CG art is on my gallery, and I've posted it on DeviantART, and am hoping for some good feedback on it.

An astronaut is supposed to come to ETSU to speak tomorrow. I'm not sure if I'm going, but I plan on it. I'll keep you posted on that.

Helped fix the house yesterday afternoon. Didn't get to do much schoolwork or anything else, same on Sunday. Wrote some, but only a paragraph or two.

Anyhows, when we were working on the house, there was a bumblebee nest somewhere in the rafters. We had to kill them one by one using a water hose to wet their wings until they fell. We got about 6-7 bees, but Andrew says a hive can consist about 50 individuals.

We were working into the night, when all of a sudden, the covering vinyl sheet that we had covered the openings of the rafters with, came a frantic buzzing. We slightly let the sheet down, and a bumble bee fell out onto the ground. When we shined the light to see where it went to squash it, it flew out of the grass straight towards the light. Andrew took the fly swatter and quickly put it six feet under.

Other than that, not a whole lot. That's about it for today. Until later,

Janeil H.

2:23pm Wednesday, Apr 4 | Edit Note | Delete
Well, not a lot today. I will be enroute to the Johnson City is about two hours, to hear the astronaut talk. I'm soo excited! Unfortunately, I can't meet Raj or Kabir because they have to go to church, and Jason has to go to class, so I will see if I can get Kacie or Sarah Walls to rendevouz with me and tag along

I'm off to work at the phsyics labs now, so that's that for the moment! Sorry there isn't much to say right now. TTYL!

1:06pm Thursday, Apr 5 | Edit Note | Delete
I think I'm ready to settle in for the weekend. I had a not-so-tiring but still busy day yesterday. Upon arriving at ETSU in Johnson City aboard the USS Orion, I bought Taco Bell food of two bean burritos, a nachos, a drink, a Fiesta Potatoes, and a Nacho Cheese Chalupa.

When I met Jason, he took me back to the dorm. I shared a burrito and some of the nachos with Jason, and gave Chuck the chalupa. He chatted with Leslie on Yahoo. Once we finished eating, per Raj's instructions, we linked up with Kacie Rowell in front of the library. We then went inside and sat down.

The astronaut who was speaking was Colonel Commander Eileen M. Collins. She was the first woman to pilot a space shuttle, flew the shuttle four times, and on her last flight, was the first woman to command a shuttle mission. She talked about a little over an hour, and then when she was done, and had a Q & A session for a few minutes. I asked if there were other choices to colonize planets other than the Moon & Mars, but she interpeted my question as universal-wide, when I was asking about the solar system...oh well. When it was all over, Chuck, Jason, and & got our picture taken with her. Then upon letting Jason upload the pictures to his computer, I proceeded to leave to Kabir's house. I saw what a Room Check was, too.

After visiting Kabir, I docked at Bayer Starbase at about 11:43 PM. I hit the sack really quick after eating some food. Mom was happy , and Dad said something like that too, but he kept going on about Spanish people & laptops...I don't get that man, I swear.

Today, did Accounting class. That out of the way, and now that I'm back at Starbase 7, I will go take a nap, since I already ate. Laters,

Janeil H.

2:46pm Monday, Apr 9 | Edit Note | Delete
Wow, I haven't blogged a lot. This is what's been going on.

This weekend was sort of a bummer. Because of religious reasons, couldn't eat bread or anything with yeast inside of it. Practically starved myself on Saturday. Sunday, finished my Nue-Guyen shipset for Space Empires IV Gold. Did a lot of yardwork that lasted all day, did a bit of schoolwork in the night, then went to bed. Very boring. I'm sure Jason had a very interesting weekend. :D

Today, had a biology test that I think that I did swell. Val hasn't shown up for class in over two weeks now...we get Political Science test on Friday. At least Mrs. Foutch taught us stuff today, and didn't let Barfy continue on with his 'I just want to touch base' lines.

Upon reaching to work-study today, Dr. Morgan presented me with something interesting. "I have a new toy I'm sure you would want to want to play with." he said, revealing a Celestron SkyScout. I am still figuring out the details of the device, but from what I read from the manual, its a device that you can aim at celestial objects, and using GPS satellite technology, it will use the information and corelating it with an internal star chart, identify the object with you. I'll get to try it out tonight, having special permission to attempt to get it running, and try it out.

A newly-found buddy on DeviantART, mormonshedevil, has decided to write a series of Gundam Seed/ Gundam Seed Destiny fics with me. We will occasionally touch on the main storyline, but ours will mainly consist of a ton of time traveling and/or visiting other universes/places. We should be able to start writing our first one by Wednesday. That I'm excited about.

Now if you excuse me, I'm off to go see if StarTopia came in, and to go play it if it came in. Later,

Janeil H.

11:32am Tuesday, Apr 10 | Edit Note | Delete
Good morning, now it is time for another blog.

StarTopia is so cool! I am at mission 3 so far, and will try to go home early and get to play it some. I want to draw art for it after seeing the Dahanese Sirens, they have cute hairstyles...I'll post pics of what I have of them that I salvaged of StarTopia post.

Dr. Morgan's testing of his SkyScout was halted when the batteries died. I tell you, they need good new batteries in the lab. Charging didn't help them. They just lost the charge almost immediately. Also that thing eats up a bunch of power trying to locate the GPS satellites...I'll retry tonight. But it did work last night, though. I located Saturn, heard an audio description of it, and used it to find some other stuff.

Sort of thirsty, but doing okay. Returing my DVD's to Popcorn Video today. My marathon of watching Stargate DVD's are complete. I watched a total of 17 episodes on four DVD's in a period of 36 hours. Man, Melissie would be proud of me. She owns alll 9 seasons of them.

Made a 88 on my Biology 2 test yesterday. I'm so happy! So close to an A, but still working away at it. I'm so going to own that class. I don't think I'm doing that well in Accounting, but I'm working on it. I have to do good. And I shall in my other classes, and attempt to salvage the Accounting.

I think that's it for the moment. Let me post those pictures of the Dahanese Sirens. :D

2:33pm Wednesday, Apr 11 | Edit Note | Delete
Okay, some ranting going on here. But other than that, that's it. I'm tired sick, and this has been eating away at me for two weeks now, and I just have to get it out.

One, I am sick and tired of people who are 22-26 year-old high class girls who are just obsessed about work & snobby. Whitney from my Biology 2 lecture is a very VERY good example. When we're supposed to pull equal loads in doing group projects, she rushes through it so "she can get to work." She leaves us in the middle of many a projects to go work at Proffits.

Then in my Accounting 2 class, there's this woman who only shows up for test day, and doesn't attend any of the Accounting lecture whatsoever because "I have to go to work!" When we had a test yesterday, she handed the teacher back the test and said, "I have no clue. I just work and work, and don't have time to figure this out." She then just left. There's also another girl in there. She's this quiet, prim, proper thing that takes a bag of Lays Baked potato chips EVERY SINGLE time in class and "delicately" eats it during the lecture. The noise from that is so distracting! Then she complains "they should put parking lots next to the building so you can walk a short distance," and "you nearly ran me over, you drive recklessly." And she speaks so timidly! For one, you scared little snail that hides in a shell, I don't drive reckless. YOU walk so slowly, and think you have all the time in the world. I obey the law when it comes to the road, and am capable of driving at least twice as better than you can. Two, EVERYBODY complains about the parking, but deal with it. What else do you expect when there's a lot of students? What do you think you're going to do when you go to ETSU and UT? You're going to have to move your prim little butt and WALK! No driving. No chauffeur service. You're going to walk!

Damn you people, what the hell don't you get about scheduling class AROUND work? I also noticed almost everyone who behaves like this has a Business they teach you a single thing about teamwork? About treating people nice? Or do they stuff instructions into your face about how to make fistfuls of money regardless of the consequences?

And then there's this rows of three guys and one girl in Biology 2 lecture. This girl just texts to no end, whispers loudly in class and carries entire conversations. Don't people have intelligence or respect anymore? Can't they comprehend anything outside their 'own little world'? Even if they can't, can they at least fricking try?!? I try, even though I don't get all of it.

You know, people tell me to have good friends, be open, and friendly. You know what? They're right. Being open does help. I've had the opportunity to meet a few good people in different places when I get the chance to leave this hellhole. But you know what? It doesn't do a damn difference if the people you're trying to be open with are all clammed up, or look on you as a freak. Just because you think you have it all together, and things are going well for you, doesn't mean you just ignore everything else outside your personal space. Shame on you that I can have a much richer conversation with an airline attendant or hotel clerk a world away that I have may seen again, or someone accompany me to something interesting that I've only met twice, versus any of my classmates that I sit with every other day for semesters on end. Shame on you when I try to be your friend, you talk to me some, then only use me for information or for your own personal reasons, and give the 'cold shoulder' when I try to be friendly. And double shame on you that none of you ever try to be a good friend, only concentrating on the people you met in the sandbox in kindergarten.

It does not help when you only have acquaintances that you meet occassionally or frequently. Why is it unless you move, you're not willing to let new people into your ring of friends or good buddies? Do I have to go to some national databank and search for people that just moved here?

Maybe I have social catching-up to do because I was homeschooled. Maybe I don't know what "ho" is or other street slang. Maybe I never had friends in my childhood years and have never experience what that was like. Maybe I never had a best friend. Maybe I do have a bad temper. Maybe I absolutely had no practice in having a best friend, and how to treat them. Maybe I'm not good with girls. I'm not perfect. On the outside, I'm just like the rest of you; a college student going to college to earn a degree so that I can get a job somewhere. I don't think that's what college should be all about. It should be a place where you can meet new people and have new experiences, and allow you to expand in ways you've never even thought of. Walters State Community College does not have that environment. WSCC students do not want to help in something like this. Correct me if I'm wrong, but that's what I've seen attending four semesters here so far. I have not seen a friendly open environment on this campus. Its a closed society, and you're only welcomed in if you've known someone really really well.

Most people think I'm some goody two-shoes because I hold certain values. It is very very hard to see people bash certain things you know are right, especially in my Political Science class. I bite my tongue every time people laugh at me because I don't approve of abortion or don't talk about crude things.

I am tired of my father. He asked me the other day; "What's one thing you'd like if your basic needs were taken care of everyday?" I answered that I would like a best friend. He looked at everyone else and laughed. "He needs a wife."

You know, maybe I do want my best friend to be a girl. Sue me that the only girls I know or used to know very well I've never ever seen face to face, and one only started to talk on the phone every two months. Its their fault I don't know a lot of girls, or how to treat one other than taking them out on some formal dinner. What I've learned for interaction with girls so far came purely from trial and error. What is so hard about girls being my friend? WHY do you not like me? Why do you chase after everyone who does wacko things? Why do you ignore me when I try to talk to you? And why does trashy slutty fat bitches just interested in getting inside my pants keep chasing after me? Do you think I'm some easy Mexican? Do you discriminate against me because I'm different from you? Do you think I don't belong in your 'backyard' of East Tennessee? Are you so unintelligent to think anything different? Can't you understand 'back off'?

I'll say it once, I'm an Indian. I come from the motherland, and my kind is the 2nd largest population on the entire world. We are one of few countries that can freely build nuclear weapons and anything to our hearts content. We are on the verge of sending astronauts of the moon within the next two decades. We may not have everything together with the whole arranged marriage thing, and many of us probably don't speak proper english, but we know how to take care of each other, and know how to value relationships and watch out for each other. We also take pride in what we do, and we know how to stand up for what's right and what we believe in, even if it means getting killed.

Residents in this area never cease to amaze & disgust me...

Nothing happened yesterday. I played Startopia some, but that's about it. Nothing else.

I'm leaving for work-study. I've had enough of this for right now.

12:20pm Thursday, Apr 12 | Edit Note | Delete
Today doesn't seem that bad today. Its actually nice and not that cold outside. Did not do well on my Accounting 2 test, and I know that I'm going to fail that class.

Finally tried the Sandbox mode on StarTopia last night. That's my only good game so far. I kept have power shortages... o_O but I think I get the hang of what to do now. Drew a variant of an alien based on a Dahanese Siren, a Dahranese. Will color tonight when I get it scanned. I will study for my Political Science test tomorrow, nap some, work on Gundam fic when mormonshedevil gets off work, and draw, and scan & upload.

Not a lot at the moment. Went up to the BCM & talked with Gregg & Adam about some of the stuff that was bothering. Felt a lot better went I went home. Hopefully, rants should never appear on Facebook, at least not of that magnitutde.

Signing off for now.

1:42pm Friday, Apr 13 | Edit Note | Delete
Today is slightly colder than yesterday, but it should hopefully be warmer soon. There was frost in the cow pastures this morning as I passed by them to go to school. I really want to have a waterfight soon.

Last night, I put out a preview of my first-ever anime music video. You take clips from a cartoon/movie, and mix them with music, thus a music video. I used footage from the final episode of Gundam Seed, and started to mix it with KOTOKO - Re-Sublimity. I had to study for Political Science, so only so much got done. The link is in my posted items. Please do go and check it out, I would like some feedback from it.

Many thanks to Raj & Sarah attempting to make me feel better. It means a lot to me, and I really really appreciate it that someone does care. Both their advice was very helpful, and I cried over Sarah's own. It was very touching. Also thanks to Adam & Gregg talking to me on Wednesday, that helped, too.

StarTopia-wise, something wierd happened last night. A Skrasher popped out of a Salt Hog, but it grew in the smack dab MIDDLE of the Zedem Monk temple in the bio-deck and was not moving, and nobody could shoot at it. Every single Security Scuzzer and alien resident that can fire a weapon has run up there, and are "dancing" around the temple. You can watch them do that for twenty minutes on end. Its a funny sight indeed; The StarTopia Temple Dance.

That's all I have to say for right now. Hungry, and would like to go home. Until then,

Janeil H.

7:48pm Monday, Apr 16 | Edit Note | Delete
Good evening. I'm surprised I'm online at this time. Not a whole lot at the moment, just my accounting project due tomorrow when I get home, the Gundam crossover with mormonshedevil, and that's about it. And the Space Raptors story.

I'm appalled about what happened at VTech. My deepest condolences go out to them. I have 2nd thoughts about security at college, even though it may be safe. 60 people hit by lead....

That's about it for now. I'll write tomorrow after I get this project all squared away,

Janeil H.

5:57pm Tuesday, Apr 17 | Edit Note | Delete
Sorry if I'm a little slow at the moment, for once, I stuck to schedule today, and I took a nap.

Turned in my project for Accounting project in today. Glad that's over, just the final for that class now. I have my math test tomorrow, so I have to study when I go home tonight. I should get my grade back from Political Science tomorrow. I also do my final for Biology tomorrow...

I was IM'ing on AIM just now when I accidentally clicked on Zzylo just now. She was a little angry when I said hi and I didn't know it was her. I deleted her. Screw her...

An epic meeting took place today; and unlike the disastrous event when I called Amber last summer, I was able to talk to mormonshedevil for the first time on the phone today. She suggested since we were so far apart and three time zones away, and that we're both Verizon users, we can chat of what we're going to do with our Gundam crossover fics. I called her about 3:30 today, and she was a little surprised when I called. I wasn't exactly sure what to say to someone i've chatted with over the internet, and she jokingly called me a dork. But that went out well. I'm happy it did. I found out her name is Kam Butler, and she's an art student at University of Nevada Las Vegas. We'll catch up later tomorrow after she comes out of class.

That done, I think I have to go home now. Later!

6:02pm Wednesday, Apr 18 | Edit Note | Delete
Feel somewhat tired at the moment and a little worn out, but doing fine so far.

We got new toys in the lab today; two interferometers that measure light wavelengths and the interference between the two, or something similar. I assembled one today and almost got it working, you just need to align the laser properly. Their bases are heavy; I put them in the cabinet. I'll mess around with them next week. Cool toys.

Also disovered that the 32" laser has a key for a switch; the design also inspired me to draw a certain type of laser rifle. All of this in due time when I get home.

Did a math test today, did final for Biology 2 lab, no Political Science class, and learned about ape-men in Biology 2 lecture. That's about it school-wise.

Found a gold-mine of information about Gundam Seed Destiny today. I knew beforehand that Meer died, but after seeing how she died, that was sad. She was a really great character, just someone thrown into something to do someone's dark deeds, and to be discarded after there was no use for her. I'm sure Kam would agree. Posted screens of various episodes, and more pics of Meer.

That's about it for now. Signing off for today.

12:39pm Thursday, Apr 19 | Edit Note | Delete
Well, finished Accounting 2 for today, Had somewhat of a rough start this morning, but I think I'll be fine. Starting from last night...

Drew some stuff, among them was a really good drawing of Meer Campbell. I used a GSD screenshot as still reference, and literally drew an almost accurate "still life" of her playing with the Hataro. I'll post it as soon as I reach the building. Great stuff. I colored it and everything! :D I think its my best art of the month.

Didn't have breakfast this morning. Food consisted of cinnamon rolls and a pack of smoked cheese wheat crackers from the vending machine on the 2nd floor. Class went by a little quick today. I'm supposed to talk a better conversation than a two-minute hi to Kam this afternoon after she gets off work. We're going to chat about the storyline, make notes, and then work on it when we're not talking to each other. Then whe we talk again, we review what we have, go over, edit, etc. We'll e-mail each other what we've type and made progress on.

To Jason regarding his note; one, glad you decided to type a note! :D I look forward to seeing more blogs and entries from you *yay*. Two, I gave you some advice, but like I said, I know how it is to feel last, not even second. When I get a good ranking in anything, like 3rd or 2nd, I think to myself, "you could have done a tad bit better, and come first. But you've made it this far. THAT you deserve credit for. Everybody else except you and the winner did not have what it took to get to where you were. You showed excellence and whatever qualities you had to get where you got to.

And even though you have a girlfriend that cares for you and parents that love you, sometimes you need to express how you feel. I understand that. Almost all the time, Mom & Dad never get what I'm talking about, or just tell me to stay home and not do anything. Having a close best friend to talk it over does help. You're not talking about a romantic relationship like a girlfriend, but someone who is on or above your level and understands what you're going through and is willing to give you advice and let you tell them what's on your mind. Your pals like Brandon, Chuck, Campbell, or BB may have done this in the past for you if they're really good friends with you.

If you can't , expressing yourself and hardly anybody listening is a whole lot better than keeping it inside and nobody knowing. Its also a lot more stressful to keep it inside, too. That's all I can think of saying for the moment.

By the way, Val, we get our tests back on Friday! See ya there! :D

Speaking of which, I'm supposed to go to the library. I think I'll go now instead of waiting to go later so I get a headstart on going home. When I get to Green Earth, I'm taking a good nap. I didn't sleep good last night. That's it for now,

Janeil H.

7:27pm Friday, Apr 20 | Edit Note | Delete
Hey, not a lot to say right now. It's Friday, what else do you expect? :P

I don't have internet at home anymore, so I'm looking for a new service provider. It'll be awhile, but I plan on having internet at home during the summer so I can do stuff online when I'm home, and not depend on having to go to the building for internet access.

Valerie has strep throat, and is under the weather. I hope she gets better soon, school's almost over. Its a very complicated sickness from what I know, and secondary infection can cause damage to other parts of your body, especially your kidneys. Hang in there...

Typed my first chapter for my Gundam crossover and shipped it off via e-mail to mormonshedevil today. Our phone coversation yesterday was somewhat akward at first; but once we started talking about normal things, stuff flowed very easily, and we got a lot planned. And she's Verizon, so yay no phone bill! :D She's a very humorous person.

I believe that's it for now. Will go home and have a semi-boring weekend.

12:43pm Tuesday, Apr 24 | Edit Note | Delete
Well, not a lot to say right now, but I get to go home early, yay!

Got almost done painting Medhavin's MTech character from Space Raptors last night. Just have to clean up the background, add some shadows different places and clean 'dirty' white pixels that litter the picture in different places, and then it will be all done! Mouse is a suggestion of mormonshedevil, I'm thinking about getting a tablet sometime in summer.

I just discovered that you can't take art classes during the summer...I'll just have to take the non-credit one; no problem, I just want to learn how to draw better. Maybe even UT or ETSU will have something, also.

I believe the suspension on the USS Orion needs to be checked, and probably be aligned also. It's not riding smoothly, and the car makes a funny knocking sound when I turn left...

Glad Jason passed his Gateway test. I hope to see him soon and we get to do stuff after we get out of school. I miss the good old days...

Aunty Indra is graduating the week after I do! Everybody's been invited, and I'm looking forward for a trip this summer.

Speaking of trips, I'm really really looking forward going to an AnimeCon if there's on nearby. I think I'll go look, I heard those things are tons of fun. Imagine, I get to meet...who knows! :D

That's about it right now, I'll talk tomorrow!

4:41pm Wednesday, Apr 25 | Edit Note | Delete
Hey, today was somewhat busy. I attended the Honors program at WSCC, and got an award for being president of the astronomy club. I'm sorry this is about five sentences short, but I'm tired and would like to go home. I'll type tomorrow,

Janeil H.

6:30pm Thursday, Apr 26 | Edit Note | Delete
Hey, some more stuff, but not a whole lot still, and time has really been horrible lately, thanks to sporadic unannounced events by my parents. I'm looking to blog properly tomorrow, if all goes well. Just did school today, and borrowed an accurate remake of "War of the Worlds" which took place in 1898, unlike most depictions in other films. I shall call mormonshedevil when I get home, and I will look into fish parts. Until then, later,

Janeil H.

5:31pm Friday, Apr 27 | Edit Note | Delete
Okay, here goes.

I attended the Walters State Honors program on Wednesday to receive an award for being president of the Astronomy Club. I got a certificate congratulating me on my service. I felt bad, though. I was allowed to bring my family and one guest; Mom & Andrew, the especially mom who means a lot, did not make it, merely because they had to run the store. Dad came with Sara, and I didn't know anyone on a very close basis to invite as a special guest. All my classmates turned down the offer, too. I didn't like it one bit. The only other people who congratulated me besides me immediate inner family was Mrs. Parker from the WSCC Library, Dr. Morgan, & Mr. Love. I did leave a 'humorous' mark, however. When it came time to give me my award, the announcer was unable to pronounce my last name. He stuttered and stammered over it in front of the entire crowd, and stopped after "Harr." He only figured out how to pronounce it after I left the stage after asking me. That made my day.

Other news, I finally figured out several Gundam Seed/Destiny terms, including what a N-Jammer Canceller is. I am sort of feeling down lately, but I don't have a rant. I'm just empty right now. At least I have some people I can talk online, but it doesn't help when you need to talk to someone, and there isn't anyone there. It bothers me when you're not allowed to leave the house on weekends, nobody visits you, nobody knows you to ask you out to go do something or come over(like that really matters, since Mom & Dad say no anyway), and nobody calls you on your cell phone except your father who wants to know where you are when you're only twenty feet away from him.

We had our final test for Political Science today. Not a lot of people were there. I will get my final grade at 9:30 next Friday when I go to get it. Mrs. Foutch is glad this is all over, and will not do any make-up of any sort for anybody after today. "Its over for those who won't be in class on Friday," She announced. A few people come to mind...

I got a 98 on my 3rd Biology lab test. Shocked is an understatement. I have never ever made a test grade that high. It blew my socks off, to say the least. Now if I can just hang in there, I can at least come out okay for next year.

That's about it for now. Signing off,

Janeil H.

Signing off for this weekend.

6:27pm Monday, Apr 30 | Edit Note | Delete

Not a lot to say today, since I'm extremely short on time. I did my biology final today; saw some people I'd probably not see on a regular basis again unless they meet up during the summer or take the class in the next semester. Ifeel weird on the last day of class; happy yet sad at the same time.

I think I'll take up mormonshedevil's offer on attending a anime convention with her. If all goes well, and permission is granted, and I save up enough money, I'll fly to Las Vegas in July sometime. This is not definite, just speculation.

The suspension problem on the USS Orion has gotten much worse. The front wheels make a knocking/clicking sound whenever I drive, and it speeds up when the car travels faster. Preliminary inspections shows that all axles are intact, so until further notice, my bird's grounded. I've been given Novastar until the problem can be figured out.

Other than that, that's it! I'll type tomorrow.

Janeil H.

8:30pm Tuesday, May 1 | Edit Note | Delete
I feel a little upset because of Mom attempting to make my computer time to zero. Just because I use it a few minutes at home does not mean that I can't use it at Starbase 7! I don't have Internet there!

That will change soon. As soon as I acquire a PeoplePC disc, I will set up an internet connection at home, and will be able to be online on the weekend. I don't care if my dad doesn't like it, we need internet at home.

I'm going home so that I can sleep and get ready for my Precalculus Triginometry Final tomorrow. Somehow I don't think it will turn out great, but I need to do the best I can.

Diagnostics from Spacedock says the USS Orion's front left transaxle is damaged. It will hold me for awhile, but will need to be replaced soon. However, because of that, she is once more comissioned into active service.

I'm waiting on mormonshedevil to get back to me on me attending a anime convention with her. She mentioned something about being 'non-existant' at school because of workloads, so I'm figuring she's busy. I'll just wait on her....

Stay safe everyone,

Janeil H.

12:56pm Wednesday, May 2 | Edit Note | Delete
Good afternoon. I am taking a brief respite of the hectic activities at Starbase 7, but will have to return soon.

Everything is okay so far. I had my math final this morning. I felt that I knew at least 3/4 of the work, and think that I did fairly to good on it.

Just hanging around the lab for awhile...will head out back to Greeneville in a little bit. At least I didn't forget my wallet today. XD

Let's see...accounting is left for tomorrow, pick up grade for Political Science on Friday...then I'm done with school! Woo hoo!

Will update you later!

Janeil H.

Yayap: Hey look!! My Alpha-Bits are spelling a secret message!! Its says, "Ooooooo!!!"

Janeil: Yayap, that's Cheerios.

-Excerpt from a Halo Crossover

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 Post subject: Barfy and parents
PostPosted: Fri Jul 20, 2007 7:10 am 
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Joined: Tue Feb 20, 2007 4:39 pm
Posts: 93
Location: Philippines
Cool blog. Don't let women, like that group that hit on you, bother you. Don't let Mr. Lawrence Barfell get to you either. Why, I'm a very serious student, and I have a whole apartment full of free books on linguistics, ancient civilizations, and foreign languages! Perhaps he does think it's a big joke for you to be interested in something with resolve and vigor. He could use a laugh, but serious students become serious teachers. He's probably jealous. He should know that free books are awesome. I hope he stayed off your back.

It's very cool that you're aparently fascinated by higher-level math and space exploration. Keep at it! Dynamics is a wonderful tool which can be used to explore a more full range of matter-bound creativity.

Relatives can be difficult domicile companions because you cannot choose them - they are who they are. But it seems like it's a good choice for you: cost-efficient and with minimum difficulties. To a certain degree, children of any age are the consolation of their parents. Your presence to your father is probably a great source of encouragement, though he may not have the realization of this which leads to mutual edification and appreciation.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 9:45 am 
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Joined: Tue Jun 13, 2006 8:30 am
Posts: 101
Location: Parrottsville, TN
Thanks for the encouragement. As you can see by the date, school has been done for about two months now, so I don't worry about Barfell anymore. But about the girls...I'll keep that advice.

Now to post the rest of my blogs. I'm way behind... :o

Yayap: Hey look!! My Alpha-Bits are spelling a secret message!! Its says, "Ooooooo!!!"

Janeil: Yayap, that's Cheerios.

-Excerpt from a Halo Crossover

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Jul 24, 2007 10:08 am 
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Joined: Tue Jun 13, 2006 8:30 am
Posts: 101
Location: Parrottsville, TN
7:13pm Thursday, May 3 | Edit Note | Delete
This entry is extremely skimpy. For right now, I am having extreme difficulties at home with Mom right now. I didn't do anything wrong; this always happens when I come back from school and finish. Its like fresh meat thrown to lions; someone new to pick on. This doesn't happen when I'm in school. I wish I had a place to stay and get out of this right now, but that's not possible. There's nobody to trust, and nobody to count on, and not enough resources to start off somewhere, despite me having a job at the moment.

That's all I have to say right now. Oh yeah, Valerie Roach is one of those damn stupid supermodels; beautiful plastic outside, garbage inside.

I'll update you later.

5:32pm Friday, May 4 | Edit Note | Delete
Sorry about the short horrible blogs lately; I am going to pick up the PeoplePC CD from Uncle Kay when I get home, so I have internet at home this weekend. Things have cooled down at home for now...I hope it stays that way for the moment.

I ordered several shakes from McDonalds in Greeneville yesterday, and the girl gave me chocolate instead of strawberry. When I went to go get it fixed, she was arguing with the managers that I ordered chocolate. Stupid people...

That's about it for now. Signing off,

Janeil H.

6:34pm Monday, May 7 | Edit Note | Delete

I just got told that I can't go with shevil to AnimeExpo this July. I was also told I couldn't go stinks. A lot of it goes by "your cousins won't go with you", "I don't want you going alone", or "I don't want you with someone off the internet."

Understandable reasons. But it extremely sucks when the people who act the most like a friend live a world away, and you can only talk to them on the phone or over the internet. DNA recombination comes to mind...

Had a Halo tournament at Wiggy Raj Starbase yesterday. It was fun; Andrew pwns. I plan to do more.

Sort of getting used to life away from school for the moment. I hope that I get to sleep late sometime soon...that never seems to happen. I also appeared to have picked up something that might be going around. Slightly sore throat and extremely runny nose are the current symptoms.

I hope I can go home soon so I can shower and rest. Later,

Janeil H.

5:42pm Tuesday, May 8 | Edit Note | Delete

Update on my sickness; moderate runny nose, almost gone sore throat, and a slight used-to-be headache.

I need someone to visit someone or something; I will write a story of what I would like in a friend, and what we'd do. I'll post it and let everyone read it. Why does the people I like live so far away? :(

Nothing eventful happened today. I HAVE to quit procrastinating and get internet at home soon...

Janeil H.

5:42pm Wednesday, May 9 | Edit Note | Delete
Major update for today; somewhat runny nose, no sore throat, but big gigantic headache...

Did my part for an art trade with someone today. Time will tell if they like it or not, but I have a feeling they would...

I will attempt to draw more stuff tonight. I like playing on the computer a lot, though...I need inspiration. Mental note to take a bath and eat ramen to relax and feel tired enough to write, but too tired to use the computer.

Janeil H.

4:59pm Thursday, May 10 | Edit Note | Delete
Today wasn't so bad. It appears that the Orion would need to be aligned as well as get the part replaced.

Nickelback's song If Everyone Cared struck me somewhere in my heart somewhere...I think its maybe both ends; people not being nice to be, and especially lately, me not being nice to people.

Its time to make my weekly call to mormonshedevil. I'm sure she'll be disappointed to hear that I can't make it, but what can I do? Mom's not letting me go and is holding me captive here, even if I work a job full time and never go to school, cannot afford to live on my own. You don't want me to go on some trip? Fine. Put up with me drawing tons of spaceships over the summer, and me blowing up whole bunch of stuff across the galaxy. At least she doesn't tell me she doesn't like aliens and combat in my sci-fi stories anymore.
Got Demonstar Secret Missions 1. A very short game, to my surprise. Not so nice...I like the Original Demonstar over it because of that.

I'm sorry my blogs are somewhat incoherent. Because I'm at the building, I can't get the proper time or environment to type them properly. It takes just as much thinking as writing a story.

Signing off for now.

6:14pm Friday, May 11 | Edit Note | Delete
Very busy today....haven't been able to keep tabs on everything. Got soda to drink today! :D Sara's been stupid, and that's about it. Mormonshedevil is extremely busy. Have a great weekend,

Janeil H.

3:06pm Wednesday, May 16 | Edit Note | Delete
Wow, I haven't typed a blog in two days....that definitely qualifies me to type on early in the day on a Wednesday.

Monday was semi-okay; just busy a lot. Mom's relatives are over, and today's the first day we're actually getting to visit with them...

Yesterday, I went to a Halo tournament in Morristown. I took Andrew with me, and we took our XBox over with our four controllers. Dan (Pp) was there, so Andrew and I were set on one team, while Pp was on another. It was a stalemate; Keith came over to play some, but Andrew as the only person on my team who could steadily kill Pp. I hope we do better on our next one...

Today it looks like it will rain....I'm sure it will this afternoon. At least I got ot sleep in late today, so I'm happy about that. :D Had to clean the house up some, but I'd rather do that then have to wake up early and go to the building. Got some art done last night, too. I'm slowly but surely getting my art count up again....

Maybe I can get together my own Halo tournament time allowing. Jason was with Leslie yesterday when I called him, so I might wait until this weekend, and may wait until Medhavin gets out of school.

Signing off for now,

Janeil H.

5:19pm Friday, May 18 | Edit Note | Delete
Okay, here the blog for the last time this week until the beginning of next week. Sorry for no blog yesterday....

Finally finished my art trades. I'm really happy about that. :D Actually, I have one request and one more pending, but the two that were high priority are now finished.

I killed a wasp the other day, and dumped it in the garbage. When I went to go make up my bed, I found its head(just its head) on it, its antennae and mouth still moving. It was creepy; I put it on a paper and watched it do this for several minutes...

I got hold of Advent Rising for XBox and the Swan Princess; I finally own them! Thanks to Brandon Barnes for the suggestion of the game, and tanks to Tulli for letting me watch the Swan Princess ages ago...(P.S, I miss playing Star Wars with you. ;))

That's aobut it for right now. I'll keep you updated,

Janeil H.

7:46pm Monday, May 21 | Edit Note | Delete
Wow, what a weekend. Was very busy on Sunday spring cleaning my room; part of it is done, at least I finished my closet. Lounged around the place on Saturday, hope to take it easy this afternoon.

CG'ed Larina last night, will try to upload later on. Have yet to type another chapter for Space Raptors - are doing fine, I'm just feeling blue. But I'm okay. Maybe I'll try to do a good Space Empires game when I get home.

Somebody call me! My number is on my profile!! Dad calling me to find out where I am (where would I go? I'm in the next room!) and his number filling up the entire Received call section is not pretty.

Over and out,

Janeil H.

6:16pm Tuesday, May 22 | Edit Note | Delete
Somewhat quick today, I actually get to go home early! :D I'm in a hurry, so that's all now. Oh, happy birthday, Adam! :D

Janeil H.

7:20pm Wednesday, May 23 | Edit Note | Delete
Well, a somewhat unventful day...went to Morristown to give Walters State my tax papers for financial aid, then spent an hour or two at Norm's place and played Halo 2 on XBox Live with Pp. That's about it for the moment. Sorry this is brief, it is really that boring over here. I will attempt a watergun fight this weekend if all goes well.

Janeil H.

6:29pm Friday, May 25 | Edit Note | Delete
This is another somewhat short blog...My legs are itching like crazy. Got games for UV that he asked for, and got a Venus Flytrap. Now to just get it home and plant it, among some other things, like draw an art trade for Tekli.

I went to Medhavin's band concert yesterday. Had a ton of fun, and got to see what a high school looked like. It was an interesting experience, me never going to high school. That much I will say for now.

Mom's relatives are coming over. They are leaving New York tonight, and will be here tomorrow morning. That's all I know.

That done, end of transmission. Have a great weekend! :D

Janeil H.

6:04pm Tuesday, May 29 | Edit Note | Delete
Still very hectic around here...unlike other days, I truly didn't get a lot of computer time. I have got to get hold of time for blogs; as soon as UPS leaves.

I plan to draw a lot of stuff when I get home. Will keep you updated.

5:51pm Wednesday, May 30 | Edit Note | Delete
Okay, not a whole lot today. Activated the mobile feature on Facebook so I can send my status better.

Cut the side of my waist with the razor blade today, not feeling nice. I still don't get how that happened... :(

Played Corridor 7, watered the garden, wrote some stuff. That's about it.

Janeil H.

6:04pm Thursday, May 31 | Edit Note | Delete
Fairly okay day today; second thought, screw Greene County Bank employees. They made me sit in the drive thru for twenty minutes, then go tell me to go cash my check at a different bank...

Aside from that, wrote a lot last night. I'll try to start drawing soon...I keep saying that, but I think I'm getting into the art mood again. Its time to go dust off the copier paper...

Fish are doing fine....I just made a startling discovery. The betta in my tank is a MALE. He made a bubble nest the other day for obvious courtship reasons, so I deduced the solution to why the fishfight happened, and explained the strange behaviour. I'll be sure to get a female from Wal-Mart, so there won't be a gender confusion this time. Bought fish food, too...that's the shortest time a can of fish food lasted; four months..

Smoke around here is unusual. People have it in Knoxville, from what I've heard. I'll keep you updated.

My eyes have vision problems at the moment, so sorry I'm not on much. For once, nobody is rushing me with my blog, but my eyes are strained. Sorry...

Janeil H.

7:44pm Friday, Jun 1 | Edit Note | Delete
Been very busy today on the USS Orion...she's in spacedock right now. I changed the transaxle, but that doesn't seem to make a difference, as I find out its the bearing. Dad will have to take it to a machine shop to get it pressed next week, so no light cruiser for use this weekend.

That's about it for right now, will keep you updated.

Janeil H.

:33pm Monday, Jun 4 | Edit Note | Delete
Spacedock update: The USS Orion's problems is a linked thing. Bad bearings wore the hub loose, which in turn caused the transaxle to break...*sigh* I'll salvage a hub from the USS Independence later today; I feel sorry for her. I though I'd get the Independence up and running, but it seems that's not the case. I'll be sure to salvage the cruise control system for it, then.

That's about it for now. Rearranged my room, need to get fish filter. Later,

Janeil H.

6:01pm Wednesday, Jun 6 | Edit Note | Delete
Very busy today! :( Got contacts to try out, but am not wearing today. Am being rushed, will update you later. USS Orion is operational, but has loose rotor because hub from the Independence was used. Later,

Janeil H>

:22pm Monday, Jun 11 | Edit Note | Delete
I'm going to be straightforward with this one. There's several things to catch up with right now.

First of all, the USS Orion has sustanined heavy hull damage and is in spacedock right now. The axle was completely repaired, and driven back home. On Thursday, I was driving the Orion back to Starbase 7 with Andrew when it cut off. I had to pull off the road and wait for Dad to come. Dad got it started, and drove off, forgetting to push the hood in. When on Cedar Creek Road, the hood flew open and smashed against the windshield of the car. The hood is bent up, and the lower corners of the windshield is cracked. The hood cannot close in its current condition.

Because of a slight misunderstanding, mormonshedevil doesn't want me to call her anymore. At least she'll still e-mail me...I don't get to talk to anyone on the phone. Jason's busy with work and Leslie, Kabir & Raj never answers, and Gregg is at work most of the time. Maybe I feel really horrible because I don't get to do the whole girl thing and understand it as well like everyone else...

Rant starting somewhat; I am tired of 'girls' that I know on a good basis being only over the internet. Everybody I have met in the flesh save a few are too dumb, immature, or too occupied with other things. Melissie's own is the only cornsterstone relationship that have stayed her for about 7 years and counting. I can only guess that it works and stays is because we started writing each other at a young age. She hardly replies her e-mails nowadays, and is probably drifiting, too.

Things are extremely volatile at this age group...screw movies that make all these fantastic relationships happen out of thin air; that's only reserved for 10-13 year olds. Why they're such good friends now is because the grew up learning how to deal with each other. People change radically from 12 to 20, and they learn to cope with it, strong foundations backing it up in case something goes wrong. Meeting new people is different; you only know each other for a month or so, if someone messes up something, its usually over, the perosn thinking you're like that. Then add in you only met three times and talk once or twice on the phone, you get the idea.

I bought FreeLancer last week at Officemax. Its cool; I still agree some of the best games are the ones that are made several years back. How it compares to DarkStar One I have yet to decide; but I'll decide later.

My contacts still don't promote good computer usage. But that doesn't stop me from typing my blog when I need to...

Signing off for now.

Janeil H>

6:17pm Tuesday, Jun 12 | Edit Note | Delete
Well, not a lot going here. Feel a tad bit better after yesterday, but am struck by reality that if I want to talk to a girl on the phone on a regular basis, its most likely good policy to be able to see them in the flesh, and them to be local. I hate it when most of the people that are cool are thousands of miles away, and you can't get off your patch of ground to go elsewhere...

Andrew & I pwned tons of noobs today in Halo online. In many makes you sick. Most of them have no honor, and do that for 'sick fun'....But we nailed them. Good.

My computer's acting up some, and I'm hoping I get it fixed soon. That's all for now,

Janeil H.

5:41pm Monday, Jun 18 | Edit Note | Delete
A very busy weekend this weekend...but somewhat interesting but tiring today. Had fun with Jason, Jennifer, Raj & Kabir at the reunion on Saturday. Also saw Ryan for the first time in several years, and Jason and I played on the XBox. Played Freelancer some, and am still looking for a job, and waiting for someone to call me back about one I applied for...

In other news, I have 'summer' blues I guess. Girl problem really needling me, especially when I can't go anywhere... T_T I'm out of here.

6:12pm Friday, Jun 22 | Edit Note | Delete
Okay, this'll take awhile.

Got an estimate to fix the USS Orion....900 bucks. I'll just have to wait. I got it so it doesn't look too bad, but it looks like something slammed into it still...but at least it'll close now.

Played Freelancer online yesterday & today. Wow, that's ton's of fun! :D I would tell you my adventures, but that would take awhile. Until next time....I'll type them out at home this weekend.

Art will be coming soon...have drawn a few stuff, and made a nice freighter last night. :D

Mussel died in my 5 gallon tank; had to emergency evacuate Guti and his three tankmate buddies to the main tank until I can clean it out. It stinks really bad...the water must have killed it because of the filter malfunction. I'll clean that tank out and get a filter for it before doing anything else to it. D:

Plants are coming along nicely. Beans are doing really well...detailed report on that later, also. Dad's telling me to go dump garbage. Until then,

Janeil H.

6:14pm Friday, Jun 29 | Edit Note | Delete
Well well, a somewhat long blog entry...

First off, didn't get the job ab Advanced Auto Parts. I went in and Jason asked the manager for an application and he/she told him that they weren't hiring I'm off for the moment.

Finally got the elusive Dromedary freighter in Freelancer. It may be the biggest freighter in the game, but that thing screams to be flown as a heavy fighter...not bad handling for a cargo hauler. And three engines too...

Have two art trades to work on this weekend, so I won't be that bored...I think I'll try inking for once; it'll come out nicer on the scanner.

Fish are doing fine...the life support failed on my 5-gallon tank, and the oyster died. I had to transfer the pearl gourami & three guppies to the main community tank. Kira's tank is in the kitchen for now; he's been making bubble nests every night this whole week. I'm guessing this is the betta's breeding season, and I'm guessing he needs a girl betta really really soon. I feel sorry for him.

That's about it for now. I'll tell you my Freelancer adventures online later. Until then, have a great weekend! :D

6:30pm Tuesday, Jul 3 | Edit Note | Delete
Heya, not a lot on this end. Didn't type the Freelancer adventures yet...but am still working on other stuff. Got some art trades to work with, so I'll be busy...beat Alien Shooter on normal today; now to try it on hard. We go buy fireworks today, and get "Independence Day." :D This'll be six years in a row I've watched it on Independence movie to match the day. Well, I'll be around, call or something.

Janeil H.

5:17pm Friday, Jul 6 | Edit Note | Delete
Heya, sorry this is brief. Not a lot going on here. Am still hanging on; will update you later when I can. Until then,

Janeil H.

6:41pm Monday, Jul 9 | Edit Note | Delete
Things are really busy right now...I can't type a proper blog in peace. I'll try to when I can. Oh, Daniel joined Faceboook. Later,

Janeil H.

2:09pm Friday, Jul 13 | Edit Note | Delete
Okay, so here goes a somewhat long blog...that's right, I'm actually typing some stuff. Here goes.

Garden is doing fine. I can't wait for my bean plants to have beans...the onions look cool, also.

Haven't drawn anything lately, but have been trying to work on Space Raptors with no success at the moment. I just need a vacation of some sort..T_T. Tried applying for a couple other jobs, but that's about it.

Fishes are doing fine...not a whole lot. I just need some food, rest, and a vacation to recharge my batteries. Unfortunately, I haven't gotten one as yet...

Dad decided to start take out anger on me and demand I get a job. You know what? Nobody has hired me. Nobody calls me back. No matter what applications I fill, nobody wants to give me a job. But this much I know; as soon as I can get some money, I will be getting out of this hellhole and away from his grasp. I have had enough of this bullying around. He talks nicely to Sara & Andrew about 'the meaning of life', but screams at me that 'to figure it out' . Go ahead and scream. When I'm with NASA, guess what? You CAN'T SCREAM IN SPACE. Eat my afterburners. T_T

Janeil H.

5:15pm Wednesday, Jul 18 | Edit Note | Delete
I'm so-so today; sort of happy, sort of sad.

I finished upgrading some parts on the USS Orion. Mostly interior, I've added the ECT feature to the drivetrain system salvaged from the USS Indepdendence. So now I can have a 'sports mode' on my bird when I need it. :D

Am I imagining things, or people who I have a good relationship seem to drift away into nothingness? I guess people do grow up, but when I try to make new connections, how come people shut me out? People say pick your friends. What use is it when you pick, they don't want to be picked? :(

That's all I have to say for the moment. I'll update you on the retrofit for the Orion.

6:10pm Friday, Jul 20 | Edit Note | Delete
Trying to type at least a short blog, but keep getting interrupted. Not a lot to say here, but working on the Orion refit. Have a great weekend,

Janeil H.

Yayap: Hey look!! My Alpha-Bits are spelling a secret message!! Its says, "Ooooooo!!!"

Janeil: Yayap, that's Cheerios.

-Excerpt from a Halo Crossover

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 04, 2007 1:05 pm 

Joined: Mon Jun 12, 2006 6:42 pm
Posts: 529
I got somthing you might like, i made a Zero Wing OST. holla at me if you end up wanting a copy. it's from the Sega (i went ahead and pulled an OST from the ROM.) the jewel case design is pretty leet too. (leet sounds like an atleantean word used for the term Ultra Cool.)

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 11:35 am 
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Joined: Tue Jun 13, 2006 8:30 am
Posts: 101
Location: Parrottsville, TN
6:10pm Friday, Jul 20, 2007 | Edit Note | Delete
Trying to type at least a short blog, but keep getting interrupted. Not a lot to say here, but working on the Orion refit. Have a great weekend,

Janeil H.

6:44pm Tuesday, Jul 24, 2007 | Edit Note | Delete
I'm sorry if my blogs are short during the summer. I promise when I go back to school, I'll have time to type more content.

I'm excited about Drag N' Brag, a car show in Newport on August 4th. I'll be going with Jason. Its only 10 days away, I can't wait!

I'm working on some art trades to try to keep my mind off my girl problem for right now. *sigh* I'm waiting, and still am, as people always tell me to. Its so distressing and goes through every body fiber as you turn in bed at night, wondering what you're doing wrong. I just don't know what to do...praying doesn't help much, either. Its like I don't get an answer. Is it no, or is it wait? I don't even get a hint. No matter how many books I read on the subject, everybody assumes you've been around girls forever, and you can just 'pick one' and start talking to them.

It stinks when I go to the BCM, and say hi to everyone, the girls either don't say anything back or say a quick hi, and they go hug everyone else. THAT really hurts. I hate being left out of the chain of connections. Everybody knows everybody else, but when you try to fit in, they don't want you to fit in. Almost all of the people I have met that don't fit in are freaks that paint their skin white and use black lipstick, the unruly black group that walks with their pants around their knees, or someone with a mental illness.

Maybe I long for a deep relationship that has lasted a few years. Maybe I do want to be friends with a girl. I know that much, bu don't know what to do next. I can literally count off on my fingers since May the times a girl has called me; one, which was Misty asking me about how my summer was going over three weeks ago.

Melissie is so busy now, and there's hardly any coversation between us anymore. I do call or IM occasionally, but she's always so busy now. And everyone else I know I only know for literally a matter of months or a year at most.

One day, Gregg asked me what I wanted a girl to do with me. It was an interesting question at the time. About three months later, I think I have an answer.

I would like a girl to study with me when I'm doing homework. I would like a girl to keep me company when I'm stuck at home and I can't go do anything else, or accompany me to places like anime conventions or amusement parks. I would like a girl to play ball with me, play on the XBox, or play on the computer. I would like a girl to hug me, give me a hair noogie to cheer me up, and share the happy moments I do have.

Mom says when people move on, other people come and fill their place. So far, I don't think that has happened yet. I don't know if I'm supposed to do something to attract them, or just sit here and wait, and one they they'll slam into me or something.

Signing off for now.

Janeil H.

6:14pm Monday, Jul 30, 2007 | Edit Note | Delete
Not a lot to say at the moment. Things are extermely hectic. Will uplink when I have more time.

Janeil H.

6:44pm Tuesday, Jul 31, 2007 | Edit Note | Delete
This is urgent, quick, and short.

In our moving process of the business, we're moving the computer systems from Starbase 7, thus cutting off internet access for non-business applications. I am busy tying up loose ends right now. I will not be online for about two weeks or more until I establish a connection at home via dial-up. I'll miss this back office; Signing off from Starbase 7 for the last time,

Janeil H.

3:27pm Friday, Aug 24, 2007 | Edit Note | Delete
Well, what do you know? I have a blog!

I have been able to upload at Walters State Community College as I finish my final business, such as parking tags, etc. I have about wrapped up here, and will be going home.

So much has happened; I have some internet at home for the moment, but its slow... :( I will let you know how my summer was. It was a very dull one, I will let you know; not even a vacation. Just a bunch of moving, and running around.

On a minor note, today marks exactly one year that Amber Garrity ended knowing me. It was a weird morning, a lot of memories went through my head as I laid in bed.

Over and out,

Janeil H.

8:29pm Thursday, Aug 30, 2007 | Edit Note | Delete
I find myself once more in the WSCC computer lab. I'm on the Greeneville campus, my Chemistry lab done over an hour ago. A lot of stuff is going through my head right now, and I don't have the will to write anything. But I'm tired of not writing anything, and not blogging like I'm supposed to.

My summer was extremely uninteresting and boring. I did not go on a vacation, merely travel with my parents to their store in Greeneville. Nobody hired me for a job, and I was unable to earn money. There was fighting between us until two weeks before school started, and I was extremely emotionally stressed. On the 2nd week of August, Mom & Dad rented out the buildling. We no longer have it, and now reside at Bayer Starbase at home.

So that was a long story short. I am once more in school again, taking Calculus 1, Physics 1 with Lab, Probability & Statistics, and Introductory Chemistry with lab. I got to Morristown Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, and go to Greeneville for Chemistry on Wednesday & Thursday nights. A somewhat hectic schedule, but I have about two days off for myself on Tuesday and Thursday.

I feel like a total flunk. I haven't exactly been the brightest and happiest person when trying to introduce myself to my classmates around me, but am ignored when I try to strike up a conversation. When I have been open and friendly they give me the "omfg, what the hell did you take to get high?" look. I have seen one or two familiar faces, and met a guy called Levi Morse from Michigan who lives down here now, and a lady called Hannah Anderson who's from Ukraine (was surprised) but that's only because they talked to me first. Everybody is too busy into their own lives, being with the people that makes up their lives. I feel so out of place trying to make my life and getting displaced.

Then the girlfriend thing again ; What do guys do to get girls fall over them all the time? What have they done to get them calling them every single minute, sending them texts upon texts? I have a few questions, mostly whys and whats. WHY people don't like me? WHY do you ignore me and don't continue a conversation with me when I talk to you? WHAT the heck am I doing wrong? I am so frustrated with this not going right. I haven't even went past the doormat, still figuring out who's good to approach and who isn't. Everything after that needs to be taught to me. I'm a freaking homeschooler, I don't know what to do. What else do you expect? I'm smart; yet you go for guys who are more ugly and brainless that I am. I may not be so smart and hot, but I'm not dumb and dirty, either.

I may sound like I'm angry, but I am getting tired of this. I have failed, messed, and screwed this up all the time. Why can't anyone like me here? There's 6 BILLION people in the world, and I haven't even ventured out into it except some major cities; its eats me up so much. There's probably a person who likes me in Baltimore, maybe even from Delhi, Tokyo, or even some far off place. Maybe even across the state line. But among the people here; teachers like me, adults are friendly with me, but the young people? I can honestly say only the people at the BCM are my regular "casual" friends that I see on an infrequent basis. I don't know what goes through all of your heads. I feel so empty not receivng affection or love. Things like hugs I haven't had for awhile. Someone sitting down with me and asking me what's on my mind has not happened in over two years. When I cry, it hurts deeply when nobody's comforting you, or even worse, just preaching to you and not offering the emotional support that I need.

You know, I read an article recently that talked about a bunch of kids at an orphanage, and how some of them where skinny and looked like they were sick, even when they were given aquedate food, clothing, and shelter. Studies found out that these kids did not receive the emotional support or love that was needed, and that they were simply shriveling away. I can about outeat Jason at Ryan's. I react a whole lot faster then someone if something is falling from a table. Yet, I'm 25 pounds underweight, even though I exercise and take vitamins. Maybe something else is wrong than just giving me food, money, and a roof over my head.

By the way, I don't know who, but there is a spy here that sometimes tells my parents what I type. I don't know who you are, but you are making my life extremely difficult when you tell them "Oh, Janeil typed so and so." They scream and yell at me, telling me to shut up and go marry somebody if I want to go tell someone how I feel. They usually end up making me cry and they just send me off to bed. STOP IT. If you want to go tattle, do it to someone who won't affect me. Just know that I KNOW you're there, somewhere. It'll be just a matter of time until I know who....

Maybe I'm some very needy kid who's desperate. But I've been hurt and rejected too many times. If someone in this forsaken hellhole has any inkling of intelligence, they would like me for who I am, and don't treat me like garbage. I've tried coming down to your level, just being a kid who goes to school, has a car, and does some of the stuff you do. You STILL don't like me. WHY?

On a minor note, if people start making clones, I'll be one of the first ones to support it, genetical engineering, and artificial humans.

I'm fed up with this. I'm going to go get Chinese food and eat BY MYSELF, since there isn't anyone I know here. T_T


8:13pm Thursday, Sep 6, 2007 | Edit Note | Delete
Okay, so Chemistry Lab is done. I'm fried, feeling horrible as ever, and itching to go rest in peace. A good game would help. I cannot wait for tomorrow. Oh wait, I have homework. Crud.. I'll uplink later.

Janeil H.

7:58pm Wednesday, Sep 12, 2007 | Edit Note | Delete
Wow, its almost been a week since I made my last blog? Completely unacceptable! :0

School is doing fine so far. I joined the International club, and am helping them out. Someone really messed up the physics labs, so I'm angry about that. Wearing contacts once more, so that's bothering my eyes.

Other than that, I'll have to take time when I'm not stressed out and update you properly. I have not done that yet since school started. Over and out,

Janeil H.

10:06am Saturday, Sep 15, 2007 | Edit Note | Delete
Well, I have a little time now. Yesterday no blog happened because the system wasn't working. Every time I would click on the Write New Note Button, it would say Error on Page.. o_O

Had a suprisingly good day yesterday. I had a calculus test early in the morning, so I was somewhat wiped out about that after it was done. I was up at the BCM, and lo and behold, I saw Pp. We played some Halo with everyone, but not before Alexa helped me conduct a survey for the international club. All in all we had tons of fun, and I have a few loose ends to tie up. :D Raj has Chemistry notes for me, and Jason has Calculus notes for me. Then I have to sort my own notes...

Life at home is not good at the moment. Dad is now declaring that I'm om the internet all the time. Right? WRONG! I work study, go to classes, do my homework, I'm HARDLY on the internet at school. Then when I come home and am free from all the stress and pressure from school, and can play music and type at peace, I'm banned from it? 0_0 I'm sick and tired of him making accusations like that. He gives me nightmares at night when he does such things. >( I'm tired of being pushed around like that, yet if I stand up, I'll just get beaten down or humiliated some other way to pacify me. I wish somebody would stand up next to me and tell him to back off and leave me alone. I'm always left on my own, almost everybody in my family agreeing with Dad.

One reason I wanted a girlfriend was so that someone could give me the love and emotional support that my parents don't provide. I get little, but whatever small amount I get from Mom, Dad cancels it out in the insults and outbursts. Even worse, Mom agrees with him when he's all "high and mighty". Now I know a girlfriend or really good trustworthy friends can't replace the love of your parents, but at least is something. Even when I pray to God and ask him to fix the situation, and help me through it, I still feel rotten and empty.

You give me food and shelter; how hard is it for someone to hug me often? You throw parties when its my birthday or if I got something from an honors program; can you make me feel special when I'm down? You leave me alone when I cry; can you hug me and tell me its all right? You call me anti-social when sometimes I need to be by myself and think things out; can you probably sit down with me and ask me what's on my mind? You gush on about how you're so proud of your other children having so many accomplishments; can you be proud of me?

That's what my life is like. That's why I want a girlfriend. I try to love my parents, but half the time it gets screwed up or it never comes back. Their idea of love is for me to go outside, quit school, become some giant business man, and provide their family with money. I just avoid them now, saving up my money so that I can leave one day soon. I want to be able to actually care about someone and have them like it, and care back for me. I don't even get to care for a pet! I've never been allowed anything except a few fish, and you can't exactly do much except give them food and change their water. Nothing fuzzy to hug, nothing to be happy to see, nothing to have muzzle your neck and cover your face in slobber.

You've read my previous blogs about wanting a girlfriend; now you know why I want one, in addition to being lonely. Since school started, this is how this has been going on. This will be the third year this is going on now. The grand question; what can be done about it? I have no earthly idea.

Oh, and to the SPY, keep your mouth shut. I am almost sure of who you are now. If you even think of blabbing this, double think it. You DON'T know the whole story. If you think you're doing this for my best interest, try living in my shoes for a day or two. And when the yellings come from typing notes on Facebook, you be there and let them scream and demoralize you . You be there and cry by yourself, having absolutely nobody to help you and stand up besides you.

Several people on Myspace and here say wait; I will wait. But every day, inside, I die more. Its kills me inside more when I'm cut off when I want to say something, or that nobody pays attention to me. Its antagonzing when I go to bed and I lay there, being extremely restless and on edge every single minute of the night. Many times I only get 4 hours of sleep because I can't sleep in peace. I'm so disraught that I can tell my health is not doing well in certain areas.


11:07pm Thursday, Sep 27, 2007 | Edit Note | Delete
Oi...I'm up late..and tired...and still want a girl that cares...I won't be typing any blogs anymore for a long long time due to some certain people. Hate to leave you in the pitch black, but eat my afterburners,you fucking freaking slaggers! T_T


12:37pm Tuesday, Dec 18, 2007 | Edit Note | Delete
I'm back.

First off, officialy school is done. Second, this will be an extremely long blog. That out of the way, let's get down to business.

Semester was semi-okay. I believe I screwed up my calculus class, but I believe everything else came out okay. Work was hard, but things seemed to be fine; I hope.

Now onto other things. I believe I have left out several weeks of my life not typing true. I can't remember them all, and I had been either too depressed or too tired, or both to type anything, but I'll do my best to catch up.

School was just going to one week or the other. Doing calculus & chemistry homework on Tuesday, doing more calculus homework on Thursday, and being able to relax on Friday night. At least I had one and a half days off per week (Thursday night was Chemistry lab).

Guess what? I believe I have gone 'rogue'. Dad's family has become total nutcases, and are gossiping who knows what about me, simply because I showed them something to see if they would take it. I feel like a lone hero against a bunch of monsters; You know what? They are monsters. Even worse, they're demons. Every single one of them. Except Jason, Medhavin, Uvraj, and maybe Uncle Joe, everyone has gone bonkers and bananas and are laughing their sorry sagging asses off. Aunty Carmen and Uncle David are probably the ringleaders of this entire shananigan...As Melissie said, they're the ones with loose lips. I know now who's enemy and who's not; it doesn't make me feel any better.

One particular story that comes to mind is something from ancient Hindu writings from something called the Bhagavad Gita. The story about Arjun and his four cousins against his entire family who didn't believe he deserved the throne to the kingdom. His family had taken vast armies from the entire country and had planned to do battle. Nobody would help or support them, so it was four of them versus over thousands of people. Finally Krishna said that he would help him and gave him some insight, but after that, it was a bloody battle that lasted 101 days, and finally, Arjun won. His entire family hated him, but against all odds, he was at least able to live on life without crappy relatives attempting to stab him to death...

That's how it is...for now. If they want to say sorry, let them. But for right now, I hate you, I hate you all, minus three cousins that are mentioned. I'm talking from a civilized standpoint; if you make fun of me and be mean to me, and I'm still nice back and it makes no difference, I have no right to like you. I DON'T like you; I'll still be all smiles and say hi whenever I see you, but know that there's a rift between them and me until you decide to stop this charade. I'm no saint, none of us are. But someone does not deserved to be wrong for no reason. That is EVIL.

Enough of the extended family rant, Mom is attempting to tear me up again. This has happened all too many times to be a coincidence; Why? Here's why. Its not intentional, but after coming back from school for the fifth time, when I attempt to fit into the lifestyle back at home, I stop up all the gears and everything goes wacko. People get upset, I get sad and cry, and my day is ruined...It's not my fault I failed so many classes.

I believe that's all my family out of the way right now. The girl problem is really annoying; school was my only social outlet. I have tried going to church, but that hasn't helped any. I hope God gives me insight or gives me something very fun to do in the meantime; everyone says wait, I am waiting, have been waiting, and still am. But am losing my mind, my health, and my sanity. Its hurting! Can't you see!?

I want to love someone. I want to hold someone's hand and go on a walk somewhere. I want to hug people. I want to give and get hair noogies. I want people to put their arms around me and me to be able to do the same. I want to be able to care for someone. How on earth am I supposed to do that when you either have a boyfriend or not interested in me? I cannot figure out why girls don't like me except that because I'm Indian, I look radically different and talk different, you think I'm from Arab land, and therefore I make bombs and want to blow up people. You want to still bring up that 9/11 garbage, go ahead. I can't change people, though I wish you can. You are dark and rotten inside not to know the difference between different types of people, and you don't have any sentience or heart to care for someone different...Shari said one world within five weeks to me; Bye. And she's a girl I'm on neutral slight-friendly terms with. Hannah at least says hi whenever she sees me, but the conversation hardly goes beyond that. I'm completely lost...girls I've seen for over a year and this is what happens when I try to interact?

I'm running out of options. The go out and care for someone is not working, especially now. I don't have answers to my questions, time and life is going by, unanswered prayers are in the balanace, and I'm still stuck in the small hellhole of Eastern Tennessee while I die more and more every day on the inside.

4:27pm Wednesday, Jan 2 | Edit Note | Delete
A new year has come, and an old one has gone...

I believe my blocking is working so far. If anything, I believe I have left my aunts and uncles in a confused tizzy, so that's good.

Got some nice stuff for Christmas. Had a great time, wish it wasn't so short. New Year's Eve and New Year's Day was busy and full of work. Went out with Sean to eat last Friday, and had to scrub my meeting with Rachel due to a family issue at home.

Drew some random stuff from New Year's Eve, played SE4 co-op with Andrew, but not a lot action-wise that has been going on. Just a lot of thought stuff.

Things that did come to mind are a boring but dramatic summer, bad school semester, breakthrough in drawing people, no pen pals to write to, girl problem, buddyship with mormonshedevil, and having a pearl gourami once more.

I help occasionally at the new store location. Hardly anything to do here, and taking a nap means cramps for days. So I get stuck in a small back office....

I'm not going to rant or blog big because I don't have the energy to, and I'm busy thinking. Until then, signing off.

Janeil H.

1:48pm Friday, Jan 4 | Edit Note | Delete
I hate Fridays....nothing good ever comes out of this designated day on the calendar....

To start off the morning, Mom was arguing with me about my cold, and was accusing me of drinking soda when I didn't. Then, I started up the Orion instead of the Novastar, because Novastar's drivetrain system was acting up yesterday. Then when Sara and I got into the car, and Mom complaining that I was impatient, while in reverse, I accidentally rammed into the side of the Nautilus, the Econoline Van. I left a large and sizeable dent, and I felt really bad. Unfortunately, Mom got extremely pissed and we got into a shouting match, she calling me irrational and unstable. I will admit I did scream loud enough that it echoed who knows how far outside, but I am sick and tired of being accused and manipulated and misunderstood. Dad came out and told me to not come to the store anymore.

Yet I'm here. This is supposed to be my last day I'm assigned here. I hated waking up at 8:30 every single morning anyhows. Its like you're in jail here; then they keep pestering you to go "get the mail". I hate being in such a routine, not allowing me any creativity of any sort. I cannot draw or write here, its like I'm in solitary confinement.

Found John Harricharan, my oldest uncle on here. Wasn't friended to Aunty Indra, so she probably doesn't know he's on Facebook. I blocked him, and his kids, Malika, and Johnatan. The last two I don't know well enough to trust; I've only seen them four times in my entire life. Someone's funeral, Trevy's wedding, stopping by their house in Atlanta in 2003, and a family reunion. They're grown-up, about 30 and 27, I think.

I feel like I want intimacy and romance with a girl, but then when all this junk happens, I'd throw it away without a thought for a strong but beautiful girl to help me out and tell my parents to back off. I can't fight them by myself. And I'm losing, badly. What remains of my individuality is now probably starting to get lost. They sat me down the night before telling me that I probably shouldn't be an astronaut. They keep PREACHING to me about MONEY, DAMN FUCKING MONEY! "Ooh, go get a job, look at Jason, look at so-and-so."

I am tired of being compared to other people. I like Jason, but I hate my parents for putting me on a scale and comparing me to other people. You want someone like them? Pull a freaking needle, hijack a lab, and clone them! Don't preach on to me how good they are, and subvert me to become like them.

I want a new mom. I want a new dad. I like Andrew, so I probably don't want a replacement. I definitely WANT another sister, and I want new aunts, uncles, and cousins. I want a grandfather. I never even knew a grandfather. One died ages ago, and the other was murdered when I was born. Some stupid world....Maybe I wouldn't want a girl so bad if I was loved at home.They make you feel so rotten inside saying we're not the enemy, yet they let you to continue to feel like this and make absolutely no effort to fix it or to help you fix it.

I want to be LOVED. Girlfriend, parent, friend, that's one thing that is seriously lacking from my life. I'm tired of feeling all alone. Mom and dad say be a normal person; Maybe I have a bunch of hate and anger inside of me today and maybe right this minute, but how the hell can I be an normal person when I can't get the basic things a normal person gets? Do you get a healthy cat when you just give it water only? Why do you treat me like this? Why am I even different?

I can't even express my pain! Whenever I cry or feel sad, they tell me to "Stop it" or "Shut up". See me now, Mom and Dad? This is what happens when you tell me to supress natural instinctive feelings. Other feelings take their place.

All I get from everyone outside is deal with it. How can I deal with it?? I might be even going senile. I see the same room, the same house, the same trees for years on end. School is becoming the same; I go there, I feel like I'm going through a food mill, just being processed for a life's work.

All of this are starting to sum up now. Not being liked by girls, not having the knowledge to know how to love and care for anyone or anything, how to stop solve this internal mess I have, I have tried counseling and even talking to a pastor, but have not gotten nowhere.

Someone said. "Its stress, let it go." You can't! Its an immediate problem in your face. No way you keep flying in a straight line if a SAM battery locked onto you and trails of smoke from several heatseeking missiles are encroaching upon you. I feel like that; and the advice I'm getting from people are like a co-pilot telling me "Cut your engines, fly in a straight line." Things that will solve the situation, like "Eject", or "bank left", I'm not getting. They're not working because I've been doing them and THEY'RE NOT WORKING.

You can go to flight school and know who's the enemy and how to deal with them. You have an instruction manual that tells you what your jet's capable of. You have a co-pilot to help you fly your jet and to keep an eye out to help. You have a base to re-fuel and re-arm and to fix your bird. For me, I could pretty much sum up myself with a badly damaged jet flying out against a bunch of enemies, no armament, no-copilot, no base, no instruction manual, and maybe one lesson from flight school; how to fly the damn thing to take off, turn, and land. I've been shot down too many times, and I've learned a few things on my own. But the biggest problems that I'm confronted with, I have absolutely no idea.

My sister is bothering me to go "GET THE MAIL!" How those words reverberate in my head like torture.....I'm going to buy chicken and EAT IT. I don't care how much fat is in it. I JUST DON'T CARE ANYMORE. Nothing makes a difference anymore. It may if someone cares for me. I have said this many a time, but I will say it again; I am tired of trying to care, but because I don't have the knowledge how to, or because people are too busy or occupied with life, my kind act is never noticed, or dismissed. Its like running into the Great Wall on foot.

I have absolutely nobody in flesh or blood that I trust. I do not trust my parents completely, or will such a relationship ever develop. One or two people have said "Why not just go stay with someone, or go with a friend somewhere?" Idiots! I don't trust anybody because you haven't trusted me, mainly because you have other people in your life. I feel like an odd puzzle piece in a small curio shop; there's several pieces all around that may fit, but they're probably thousands of miles away. I really want to go out and explore the world around me. I KNOW that the people who'll be my best friend, future girlfriend, or best friend that's a girl does not live in Parrottsville, Greeneville, Morristown, Newport, or anywhere in between. People who have a heart family-wise, friend-wise, or romance-wise are out there, but out of my reach. Mom has said "Oh, stop wanting things you don't want."

You know what? They grew up in a large community. They knew people down the street. Entire families lived in one house, including extended family members. They went to public school. Need I say more? I DIDN'T!!! You don't know what I FEEL! You DO NOT! You could not even possible imagine what I feel! Why my brother and sister don't feel that way? Simple! They're not ME! They like being by themselves. You pamper them. They're like you. They're like little walking copies of you. Because I was different, I caused confusion because I needed to be raised differently. You thought I was evil. You thought I was rebellious. You hated me being strong-willed. You had absolutely no idea how to treat or deal with me. You hit me when I didn't do something the other kids did. You criticized me when I wanted to do something different to express myself. You thought I was "getting corrupted by outside" by wanting friends!! And you want to know WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME!?!?!

They've hated me having friends from the start. Even up to this day, I cannot talk on the phone to another person in peace at the house. You have to ask who it is, know EXACTLY what they want, question why I'm wasting my time with friends, and if its a girl(which it rarely is), you want to know how I'm involved with her, where I met her, and interrogate me as if the person who called is some type of criminal.

I'm really pissed at myself for trying to fit into other people's lives. I hate them for making time for everyone, such as they're boyfriend for example, then they never even bother to return a call or an e-mail. I feel angry at myself for trying, knowing all too well that they'll never bother with me, and that I never grew up with other people so that I fit in with them. Amanda Ashby is one person who's like that. Jessica Jemison is another. All of them have life going all so well for them, or oh so crappy for them, they have everyone to run to. I have absolutely NOBODY to depend on. If something ever happened and I was put to live on my own, I would have to quit school, and work full time to support myself. There would be no friends I would ask for help, nobody to stay with until I get a place to live, and nobody to trust and confide in.

My life is empty. Maybe people see that without me saying a single word and that's why they don't like me. They see I'm worthless and say to themselves "Why the heck should I be friends with him? I have to give to get something good out of him."

I don't question God, but I don't see how he's supposed to help me. I keep praying, but get no answer, and no improvement in life. All I get is Mom and Dad preaching to me to stop going after friends, earn money, and to figure it out. I want to trust God, but I have absolutely no idea what he wants from me, except to obey his laws. All I know that every single day these same feelings kill me day after day. No matter what Sean says, no matter what Damon tells me in his office, that doesn't fix my spiritual or internal problems I'm combating against. It'll probably make me feel better that same day, but come the next week, same spot, maybe even worse. I've even questioned if I even know what life is about, or how to live it.

If somebody actually cared that read this, they'd drive up to my house and take me somewhere, somewhere I can cry without my parents stopping me, somewhere I can love and be loved, and somewhere I can be safe. They would care about their own life and what was happening in it, but they would also see a friend in need and try to help him. There's absolutely nobody on my friends list that would do that. If someone thought this, but said "Oh, I don't know where you live," there's a freaking thing called There's a thing called Improvise. Use it! Even if you're on the other side of the country...I know some doesn't have the resources to do that. But only five or six people live more than 30 miles from my home on my friends list.

When any of you call, I answer you when I can. Its a rare event someone calls that I devote special attention to it. I even leave the shower when I'm dripping wet and go to answer the phone! The only times I don't answer is when my parents around. Unfortunately, they're almost always around, watching me.

Maybe you're starting to get a small glimpse of how I feel inside. I'm going to stop now, but this is how I feel every second of the day, every day, every week, every month, every year. Nothing has changed from last year. If anything, getting hurt more.

3:57pm Monday, Jan 28 | Edit Note | Delete
I should have been typing my blog, but instead, was watching videos for anime conventions...

I believe the driver side transaxle is going bad again on the USS Orion. Why I do not know. It held up for several months, but seem to be going bad again...I'll have to look at it and do a detailed diagnostics once this weather gets a little better...

School seems okay. Mr. McGhee is my history teacher, so I'm having fun so far. Physics seems a bit muddled, and I have geography to do... 0_0. I also have Creative Writing online. Its the Geography and Physics I'm worried about...

Finally made my reservations for Animazement 2008, and paid my registration fees! Yay! But then not so yay, because I don't have anybody to go cosplay with. :( I was hoping on doing a Meer/Kira cosplay or a Kayron/Eona or a Kayron/Meer, but alas, I don't have a friend that's a girl that likes to cosplay. I shouldn't go counting eggs since I still have until May...

Everything is keeping fine so far. Aurora Security Council reports that Barbara Warbara is demanding to know my wherabouts and my activities. Not on your life. There's a reason I blocked Raj and Kabir; and now it appears that everyone is in a feeding frenzy, wanting to know why I went off radar and what happened to me. For once in a long long time, I literally laughed my butt off, underwear included. THAT made my day. ;)

Anyhows, while I attempt to contain excitement about my con and live my life until then, I will go attend the International Club Meeting. :D Until then, laters! :D

4:49pm Wednesday, Jan 30 | Edit Note | Delete
Well, a tiring and probably busy day. Did history; Mr. MaGhee said "Oh baby baby" for the first time this semester. Did work study, and got to meet Dr. Morgan's wife. The two of them are very funny apparently, reminds me of Jennifer in my fiction. She was actually sitting on a chair and had her feet on his desk... XD

About finished my Space Marine costume for Animazement 2008. That'll give me something to work out my extra energy that wants to go to an anime the meantime, there's geography to study, stories to write, and other stuff to do. I have cancelled my trip to ETSU today.

5:24pm Thursday, Jan 31 | Edit Note | Delete
Good afternoon, not much to say at the moment. I will say one thing. I really hate the people in my geography class; about two or three of them are from Parman's chemistry clas... T_T I also had a test in there, I belive I did a 70 on it at least. I have to get good grades...anyways, I'm heading home early. Later,

Janeil H.

Yayap: Hey look!! My Alpha-Bits are spelling a secret message!! Its says, "Ooooooo!!!"

Janeil: Yayap, that's Cheerios.

-Excerpt from a Halo Crossover

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 06, 2008 12:05 am 

Joined: Mon Jun 12, 2006 6:42 pm
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Spam Alert! (just kidding!) damn, it sounds like you have alot going on. Also try to keep the obscenitys on the hush. I saw the F-word a few times. If you can, edit these before you just paste them.

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PostPosted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 12:06 am 
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Posts: 210
Location: Russia, Moscow Region, Balashiha
So emorional... Tiger, so, all that happens with you isnt such a things that you think. It's a normal life and it's great all in all. Nobody picks you with a knife, no one is aiming a gun to you, you have a meal. You have a GF sometimes - love is a luxurious thing for me, for example. Why are you so depressive? Maybe you too much passive and awaiting something? Life needs actions, dont build the Mannerheim line!


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 16, 2008 7:58 am 

Joined: Mon Jun 12, 2006 6:42 pm
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(which is why i have great dual weapons! Yeah seriously, maybe you shouldn't post your blogs directly, because i'll be very honest, i don't think people will read all of the above... (i did) i fund it rather interesting, then again i am now a Spiritual Healer

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PostPosted: Sun Feb 17, 2008 3:50 am 
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Location: Russia, Moscow Region, Balashiha
Yeah, you are right) Blog reading must'nt be a punishment for brain. btw, i like when blog contains a pics, it makes it better looks, and more interesting. And it could be only assotiated with a theme pics, like illustrarions in the book somekind) Blogging - like a shooting, have some rules))


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